Smooth Operator 10 Posted December 7, 2006 Share Posted December 7, 2006 Mine was when I was courting wor lass and we popped up to my mothers to have a bit of a wrestle cos my room was on the ground floor and with it being in the afternoon someone could have just walked in. Anyway we get up there, I whip the Johnny on and thrash the living shit out of her front bottom. We dress and tidy up. Tie a knot in the Johnny and go to leave. But at the last minute think I best let the dog out for a piss. So I place the full to bursting Johnny on the window cill by the front door where my mother keeps her mail and go and let the dog out. I never picked the Johnny up again on the way out did I. So the next day I phone me mam, "Er Mam did I leave something at yours yesterday?" Mam: "Yes Daniel!!!!" Me:"Oh shit, sorry mam". Mam: "Well at least your using protection which is more than I can say for your sister!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gram 0 Posted December 7, 2006 Share Posted December 7, 2006 Dropped some acid, was at home for the weekend. Stood on bed buck naked to turn telly over with raging hard on (which for some reason always with acid) Fatha walked in and said 'Alright son?' He looked at me and swiftly retreated and the matter hasnt come up in conversation since. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 15372 Posted December 7, 2006 Share Posted December 7, 2006 Went out with a girl once. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brock Manson 0 Posted December 7, 2006 Share Posted December 7, 2006 Doesn't get much worse than singing Hero dressed as Enrique tbh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tooj 17 Posted December 7, 2006 Share Posted December 7, 2006 Went out with a girl once. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Toplass-101 Posted December 7, 2006 Share Posted December 7, 2006 Mine was on a school tip, I was getting changed on the beach when the towel dropped and I was stood starkers, infront of the whole class! even the teachers laughed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brock Manson 0 Posted December 7, 2006 Share Posted December 7, 2006 Mine was on a school tip, I was getting changed on the beach when the towel dropped and I was stood starkers, infront of the whole class! even the teachers laughed Were you on the drink again? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sweetleftpeg 0 Posted December 8, 2006 Share Posted December 8, 2006 Mine was on a school tip, I was getting changed on the beach when the towel dropped and I was stood starkers, infront of the whole class! even the teachers laughed Were you on the drink again? It was a school trip man. Of course she was. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JawD 99 Posted December 8, 2006 Share Posted December 8, 2006 Mid teens iirc, living with my Father and step mother, left a "Fiesta" in the bog and my step mother found it My Dad found it pretty funny like. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sweetleftpeg 0 Posted December 8, 2006 Share Posted December 8, 2006 Mid teens iirc, living with my Father and step mother, left a "Fiesta" in the bog and my step mother found it My Dad found it pretty funny like. That's a great bit of parking to be fair. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 44273 Posted December 8, 2006 Share Posted December 8, 2006 Dropped some acid, was at home for the weekend. Stood on bed buck naked to turn telly over with raging hard on (which for some reason always with acid) Fatha walked in and said 'Alright son?' He looked at me and swiftly retreated and the matter hasnt come up in conversation since. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kid Dynamite 6985 Posted December 8, 2006 Share Posted December 8, 2006 Without going into details, my mam found a picture of my erect member that my lass had taken and transferred to the PC. My dad had 'a quiet word' with me about it. Devastated! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest alex Posted December 8, 2006 Share Posted December 8, 2006 "Above average son." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kid Dynamite 6985 Posted December 8, 2006 Share Posted December 8, 2006 Your jealousy and obsession with me knows no bounds! Im flattered gorgeous x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest alex Posted December 8, 2006 Share Posted December 8, 2006 Your jealousy and obsession with me knows no bounds! Im flattered gorgeous x Aye, I'm obsessed with you like Get back to your Mam's garage to play on your retro arcade machine man, you sad fucking knobcheese. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kid Dynamite 6985 Posted December 8, 2006 Share Posted December 8, 2006 oooh, hit me where it hurts! I guess while im playing in my mams garage you will be making your seventeen thousandth post on here! Your social life must be ace!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catmag 336 Posted December 8, 2006 Share Posted December 8, 2006 Play nice please, children. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 44273 Posted December 8, 2006 Share Posted December 8, 2006 Here we go! He didn't even have to wait for the bizarre thread to get going. I'll save you a lot of bother and tell you that we know you bring your mates round to play on the arcade so it's not just you it's a social thing, we know your lass is lush, and we know that you know that you've got a great social life, so you don't care what any of us think. We also know that we are all sad bastards who live our lives through the internet. We can probably nip this one in the bud now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Craig 6672 Posted December 8, 2006 Share Posted December 8, 2006 Without going into details, my mam found a picture of my erect member that my lass had taken and transferred to the PC. My dad had 'a quiet word' with me about it. Devastated! Aye.....righto! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sweetleftpeg 0 Posted December 8, 2006 Share Posted December 8, 2006 E-mailed to Mags tbh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kid Dynamite 6985 Posted December 8, 2006 Share Posted December 8, 2006 Here we go! He didn't even have to wait for the bizarre thread to get going. I'll save you a lot of bother and tell you that we know you bring your mates round to play on the arcade so it's not just you it's a social thing, we know your lass is lush, and we know that you know that you've got a great social life, so you don't care what any of us think. We also know that we are all sad bastards who live our lives through the internet. We can probably nip this one in the bud now. You see thats where you are wrong! My mates arent really a big fan of games and my social life is fair to middling Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChezGiven 0 Posted December 8, 2006 Share Posted December 8, 2006 First time i went to see my current lass when we started going out (first time, 7 years ago now), i had travelled up from london on the train. I had a burger king at kings x, got some stellas in etc. I think i would have had some food from the buffet car on the way up too. Got to our lasses and just as i kissed her this fart came out that must have been the mix of GNER food, lager and nerves. It was a horrendous stink. Fortunatley for me she just laughed but i was mortified. She likes to bring the story up from time to time too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest alex Posted December 8, 2006 Share Posted December 8, 2006 oooh, hit me where it hurts! I guess while im playing in my mams garage you will be making your seventeen thousandth post on here! Your social life must be ace!!! From work cockring Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now