Penguin

2-0, uh oh.

What they need to do is, hire 11 really really really fit girls, stand them in the dressing room before kick-off and have Shearer say "Right, get 3 points right here tonight, and at full time you can all have a go each on one of these lasses standing here." That should be motivation enough. What do you think?

He'll probably get dibs on a few Man United reserves though to strengthen his side.

Shocking defending, basically said "Have a free header". Well done.

I think Iain Dowie was talking to Rio Ferdinand yesterday to get some advice and tips for Colo

He's just genuinely clueless.

Probably because he'll be playing in a league where the standards are lower...

Should've kept Bramble

£10 million. £10 fecking million.

I wonder who he's gonna take a swing at this time

It'll mean some games on friday nights and midweek leaving the weekends free to go shopping with the missus. Good luck, lads

I suggest they hire Mike Bassett.

I haven't seen that vid, I don't like watching myself on camera.

Those kind of videos bring tears to the eyes. Squeamish, stomach twisting and overall shock.

Relax, Newcastle aren't going down