Park Life

Exactly. Plus would you want your brand worn by a foul mouthed pot bellied old pikey, with a greasy salt n pepper quiff to boot, talking shite at press conferences? Bit harsh on Peasepud.

I tend to agree with you Alex. I think the "plan" is this: 1. Short term - bottom half of table. Clear out poor value and older players on high wages. This includes Viduka, Owen, Geremi, Cacapa, Smith, Duff. Balance remaining transfer outgoings with sales of players to generate offsetting transfer incomings. Occasional purchase as necessary, to be balanced by sale of existing squad member. Surpluses to be used to cover operating losses due to wage bill. 2. Medium term - consolidate mid table. Rebalance revenue/wage bill. Improve quality of first team squad with one off purchases of quality players. Must be young and probably foreign - therefore reasonable wage demands and good resale value. Annual transfer budget 20m (based on previous statements) 3. Long term - push for top 6. This to be done by bringing through top quality players from Academy with little outlay, and occasional one off purchase. Annual transfer budget up to 20m. Dennis Wise to oversee recruitment of starlets and senior players in DoF role. The 'plan' has several major shortcomings imo. It assumes there is sufficient quality in the first team squad to tolerate departures and recruitment of lesser talent. It doesn't. It also ignores the prevalence of injuries and suspensions at the club. It assumes we can attract who we like and pay them lesser wages, we can't. It ignores the fact that JFK is a second rate manager. It assumes that you can replicate the success of clubs like Arsenal in bringing through major talent - the jury's out. It places huge faith in Dennis Wise and the scouting team's ability to spot major talent at the age of 16 or 17. And so on. To be fair, it's a better long term plan than Freddy's technique of picking up the phone to Willie McKay on the last day of the transfer window to see who's available. But it's no guarantee of success. The biggest flaw is the failure to bring in a talented long term managerial appointment who can mould the shape of the team. This is what the advocates of Ashley's 'plan' ignore -that to replicate the Arsenal model, you need Arsene Wenger - a man with a huge contact book and a clear vision of how his teams play that is instilled at every level of the club from the Academy upwards. We've got Joe Kinnear. Fail. these sort of posts, ie the ones that talk about grand "plans". are all well and good, but you let yourself down by making cheap shots at the old regime for their "lack of planning", in particular the phrase "Freddy's technique of picking up the phone to Willie McKay on the last day of the transfer window". Stuff like this mate is unnecessary and also very very untrue. I could give you a whole shitload of players who were signed nowhere near the end of the transfer window, including some very good astute buys, at good prices, with the potential to get better, that improved the team.......and most of all, achieved good league positions, certainly much better than Ashley will ever achieve with his blinkered view, which is either short term or completely clueless, or a mixture of both which is what I suspect. There is nothing wrong with making last minute transfer deals, nor is there anything wrong with "trophy players". Lots of clubs, some of them big clubs, have just made them, and are in a much better position just now than us. Its a pity we didn't make a few more in fact. This is not a defence of anyone in particular on the old board, but it most definitely a defence of how they did things because sometimes, quite often in fact, they got it spot on. I understand your perspective re Freddy. The comment was meant to be more a light hearted throwaway than anything else but it's fair enough to pull me up on it. I've got no desire to debate the old board - their time is past - but they're looking like a fckn golden age right now. The main thrust of my post was really trying to guess what the Ashley 'plan' is, assuming there is one. As you can probably tell, I'm highly sceptical of whether it would actually work anyway - it seems they're trying to achieve success on the cheap, which as we all know is not possible in this day and age. It's rubbish to suggest Arsenal have achieved what they have on the basis of no investment in players. Also they've significantly improved the players in their squad and I don't think we have shown any signs of that in recent history. The idea that football can be approached like a standard business is really nonsensical imo; if prem history teaches us anything, it's that getting the right man as manager and backing them with sufficient funds is the beginning and end of how to be successful, everything else flows from that. In other words, far more important than any system, plan, or even recruitment of players, is the right man as manager. As we all know this is very hard to do and imo requires a great deal of thought, consultation, vision, jusdgement and most importantly luck. They haven't got that right with JFK however, it's obvious. As long as he's there, it doesn't matter how good the 'plan' is, or how logical it is on paper, it's not going to work. imho of course. Totally agree Kitty, I think you maybe even have to throw the business rule book out the window. Where was Wenger recruited from Grampus 8?

I tend to agree with you Alex. I think the "plan" is this: 1. Short term - bottom half of table. Clear out poor value and older players on high wages. This includes Viduka, Owen, Geremi, Cacapa, Smith, Duff. Balance remaining transfer outgoings with sales of players to generate offsetting transfer incomings. Occasional purchase as necessary, to be balanced by sale of existing squad member. Surpluses to be used to cover operating losses due to wage bill. 2. Medium term - consolidate mid table. Rebalance revenue/wage bill. Improve quality of first team squad with one off purchases of quality players. Must be young and probably foreign - therefore reasonable wage demands and good resale value. Annual transfer budget 20m (based on previous statements) 3. Long term - push for top 6. This to be done by bringing through top quality players from Academy with little outlay, and occasional one off purchase. Annual transfer budget up to 20m. Dennis Wise to oversee recruitment of starlets and senior players in DoF role. The 'plan' has several major shortcomings imo. It assumes there is sufficient quality in the first team squad to tolerate departures and recruitment of lesser talent. It doesn't. It also ignores the prevalence of injuries and suspensions at the club. It assumes we can attract who we like and pay them lesser wages, we can't. It ignores the fact that JFK is a second rate manager. It assumes that you can replicate the success of clubs like Arsenal in bringing through major talent - the jury's out. It places huge faith in Dennis Wise and the scouting team's ability to spot major talent at the age of 16 or 17. And so on. To be fair, it's a better long term plan than Freddy's technique of picking up the phone to Willie McKay on the last day of the transfer window to see who's available. But it's no guarantee of success. The biggest flaw is the failure to bring in a talented long term managerial appointment who can mould the shape of the team. This is what the advocates of Ashley's 'plan' ignore -that to replicate the Arsenal model, you need Arsene Wenger - a man with a huge contact book and a clear vision of how his teams play that is instilled at every level of the club from the Academy upwards. We've got Joe Kinnear. Fail. these sort of posts, ie the ones that talk about grand "plans". are all well and good, but you let yourself down by making cheap shots at the old regime for their "lack of planning", in particular the phrase "Freddy's technique of picking up the phone to Willie McKay on the last day of the transfer window". Stuff like this mate is unnecessary and also very very untrue. I could give you a whole shitload of players who were signed nowhere near the end of the transfer window, including some very good astute buys, at good prices, with the potential to get better, that improved the team.......and most of all, achieved good league positions, certainly much better than Ashley will ever achieve with his blinkered view, which is either short term or completely clueless, or a mixture of both which is what I suspect. There is nothing wrong with making last minute transfer deals, nor is there anything wrong with "trophy players". Lots of clubs, some of them big clubs, have just made them, and are in a much better position just now than us. Its a pity we didn't make a few more in fact. This is not a defence of anyone in particular on the old board, but it most definitely a defence of how they did things because sometimes, quite often in fact, they got it spot on. I think Spurs are looking for a back up plan for "the plan" and perhaps a back up even to that ""plan"".

You got to be having a laugh.Imo the next 3 games will give us an idea of what hope we have,For me we need at least 7pts from the next 3 games 'cos the 4 games after that we will be lucky to pick up 2pts. Either way the thought of Ameobi leading our front line next season has me in that place between laughing and crying. The Parkanometer never lies my friend.

I was just holding out for a few more noms actually.

That's something I'd expect to hear from Jimbo Rumbled.

I think we've found our winner.

Did you read the thread title numpty?

Has to be Oba.

Tempted to whack a poll on this.

I'd like a black away kit with grey socks. Mmmmm....Mother!

Just a scarf. That's a bit 'out there' innit?

Already done it.

2% iirc

I was hoping for Gabicci or Campagnolo.

Sat recon and all that. Sounds very interesting.

Looks a better player at Villa.

Newcastle manager Kevin Keegan held crisis talks with owner Mike Ashley at the weekend and told him he cannot guarantee Premier League football at St James' Park next season. Ashley is worried about the growing spectre of relegation and met Keegan in the wake of Saturday's 1-0 defeat by Blackburn. The former England head coach said he was unable to offer Ashley guarantees that he would guide the club to safety just six weeks after being handed a three-year contract as Sam Allardyce's replacement. Keegan is believed to have blamed the failure to sign any players during the January transfer window and a difficult fixture list. Keegan's demoralised squad face tough trips to Liverpool and the in-form Birmingham. Keegan is yet to taste victory in his second spell at Newcastle and has picked up just two points in seven matches. It is a run that leaves his side three points above the relegation zone. "We have the players and know-how to get out of it," Keegan said. "It is a test but the Premier League is a test from fixture one to 38 or 39 in the future. You need 40 points to stay up and you can't even be sure about that. We are not safe yet by no means." Newcastle chairman Chris Mort, who runs the club on Ashley's behalf, gave Keegan a vote of confidence yesterday. "Clearly Kevin wants to turn the results around and that is what he has come to do so that aspect is disappointing but it will come," Mort said. "Kevin has got the players playing very well and I'm sure the results will follow. Are the board 100 per cent behind KK? Yes, of course they are. He has come into a club where we changed the manager in the middle of the season because it wasn't going well. We were playing poorly and results reflected that. Kevin came in knowing it was going to be a difficult job to turn the club around but that is something he is working on.

He's only saying this to big his own side up who hammered them 3-1. He should stick to smoking grass and staring in 70's porn. Villa Worst side we've played at SJP this season other than Stoke. Wank fans. Wank club. Boring cunts.

Martin Jol thinks that Aston Villa could rival Arsenal for a top-four Premier League place this season. Jol's Hamburg side entertain Martin O'Neil's men in the final game of their Uefa Cup group stage campaign. And the former Tottenham boss is full of praise for Villa and thinks they could already be a match for Arsenal. "I would say Villa are in the top five clubs now - and they could be a top-four club," said Jol. "Arsenal are not so good now. They are no longer automatically a top-four side. Villa can definitely take their place and can reach the Champions League. "They are one of the bigger clubs. In fact, when they won the European Cup (in 1982) I was there at the game in Rotterdam. "I had to keep quiet as I was amongst the Villa fans. "Villa are now a great side and we were interested at Tottenham in signing Ashley Young. He was a bit too expensive in the end at £9million. "But he has gone up a level since then, Gabriel Agbonlahor is one of the quickest players in the Premier League while James Milner is also an excellent player. "They have got the talent, as we had a couple of years ago at Spurs, and the future is for them."

No we need a seaweed diet. FACT. It might kelp. I'll set them up.

No we need a seaweed diet. FACT.

They are both "kraut" Indeed, they both have their headquarters in the same town. No wonder as their founders were brothers... One of the major shareholders (some old bat) lives quite near me.

Fuse lit.

Nobby. Banned for requesting an illegal stream and managed a whopping two days before trying to re-register with a different username and his new work email address. Which contains his full name, just like his old work email address. Unlucky Michael, you are as thick as pigshit. [Dave/] Permanent IP ban. Fuckin hell.