Kevin Carr's Gloves

Wondered why you were so popular. Even some friends have heard of you. Well aren't you just the stand-up comedian. I apologise for everything I do today I had a massive panic attack after waking up from a bad dream last night at 10pm and haven't been to sleep since.

Bockwurst. Got some from Sainsbury and some from lidl and lidl is superior. Also big bags of Pasta, Bratwursts, Misterchoc, beer.

Wondered why you were so popular. Even some friends have heard of you.

Battled to save a stab victim on Monday night and succeeded. Dead boring job, mine It was irony cos mine is soooooooo boring.

Chelsea clampdown on celery-throwers leads to bans Tuesday March 27, 01:29 PM Click to enlarge photo LONDON (Reuters) - Chelsea have banned three of their fans after they were caught throwing celery during the team's FA Cup win at Tottenham Hotspur, the Premier League champions said on Tuesday. Two of them were arrested for throwing celery during the quarter-final replay on March 19, while a third was spotted throwing the vegetable and later identified to the club. A fourth supporter was banned for a pitch incursion. "All four people have been banned by the club and three will face court bans depending on the outcome of any criminal proceedings," the club said on its Web site www.chelseafc.com. Chelsea had warned their fans three days before the replay against throwing celery during matches, saying it was a criminal offence and that anyone caught could be banned. The unlikely warning had followed referee reports which mentioned celery-throwing at two previous Chelsea matches and which were being investigated by the Football Association. Though celery has recently been landing on the pitch, Chelsea fans have been throwing it among themselves, and singing an unprintable song about the vegetable, for more than two decades. Anyboday able to shed any more light on this.

Ask Cath to tell you about her day at work. Sleep will be 5 minutes away. This is untrue and only said in a crap effort at a joke. Sorry Cath.

1: I am really quite tired. 2: I found out saying "I understand it I just don't agree with it" really winds up Economics tutors. 3: There is a lectutrer more boring than our economics one. 4: Gardens are great. 5: I really don't like busses.

Gladiator benefitting from crap there then cos it was poor itself. To find the best film of the genre you have to go back to Spartacus. Gladiator is a pale imitation of it. And once and for all Joaquin Pheonix cannot act. Spartacus - the worst film Kubrick was ever involved with. Ben-Hur was canny. Have you heard of eyes wide shut?

Looks like Anton Ferdinand is a dead cert then useless twat.

Something is going to kick off cos the Argies are making noises about the falklands again.

There is no better piece of commentary in the entire world than "The bowler's Holding the batsman's Willie" Factomundo!!!!

Gladiator benefitting from crap there then cos it was poor itself. To find the best film of the genre you have to go back to Spartacus. Gladiator is a pale imitation of it. And once and for all Joaquin Pheonix cannot act.

Great is overdoing it a tad like. Canny funny though. It's really just Kevin Smith pissing about with his mates. Does have some really funny moments in it but it's not in the same class as Clerks, Dogma or Chasing Amy as film. I liked mallrats too

I have 3 days of normal work left woohoo. Unfortunately it also means I will be posting on here a lot less boohoo. This is due to me really taking the piss and doing very little actual work and spending more time on here (just call me Gemmill Jr). This place has kept me sane (or annoyed the tits off me hello LM) due to the annoying nature of my work. That is taking calls from the same skiving twats every day and listening to their feeble excuses for not turning in to work. And having quite possibly the worst HR I have ever worked with who will not do a f*cking thing to rectify it. And not being able to say "stop skiving twat and come into work". I go to be a student by day and mr reliance at night. If you have any relatives who are in the pokey and want to escape just let me know. When I do leave I really cannot justify being on here as much. Thats justify to my wife not anything else. The summer is arriving and we have a garden and a garage to paint. So 3 more days left so let's get some interesting stuff going. I won't start.

Which Aussie one. Erm..the one that nearly gets burnt by his father at the end cos he thinks he's dead. Cool. It's just that Elrond is Aussie too.

Both done in Iraqi territory where the iranians are acting illegally. Spot on about the last bit though.

Which Aussie one.

The laughing gnome (beware drugs kids make you look a right wanker).

It surely can't be that real....I mean 300 Greeks holding back 50,000 Persians... There are some nice bits in it.. Yep it wasn't just 300 Spartans, it was 300 Spartans, a maybe couple of 1000 helots from Sparta, as well as a few 1000 other troops from various Greek sources. So it was probably 4000-7000 Greeks against 75,000-300,000+ Persians. The were still hugely outnumbered by the Persians, however, but they chose their (narrow) ground well and quite simply the Persians probably couldn't bring enough numbers to bare to overwhelm the Spartan/Greek phalanx long speared killing machine (although there’s also accounts of them using fainted routs to draw their enemy in, before turning and destroying them – something that couldn’t have been done without the utmost skill, discipline and training) . Possibly they also underestimated them initially and by the time they didn’t the scale of casualties inflicted would have already sapped Persian morale massively. There are examples of similar things (although probably not quite as dramatic) in military history right up until firearms stopped that sort of thing being as effective tbh. Frankly trying to take a Greek Phalanx without flanking it was probably something like trying to stop an industrial meat grinder by throwing meat into it, possible, but it was going to take a lot of “meat” to do it. 300 Spartans not sure about Helot numbers. 300 Thebans and 700 Thespians (spent most of their time striking dramatic poses and emoting).

I do a "Paradise by the dashboard light" duet with my mate....and yes he does the man bits Oh come on Radgi I bet you have done the mans bits more than once yourself

Not sure I would call; 97 wins, 93 losses, 60 draws, an average job, that's about a 38% win ratio. Below average?

Hollywood land. Not exactly quick but interesting.

The wifes are nice and big. I love em.

Anyone heard of this. I am doing an essay on it and cos i hate psychology I am ripping it to bits.

When I was in Germay I used to go out with a girl who rode a Vespa. Wjen i stayed at hers I would make her drop me off a street away from camp so no one could see me getting a lift on it.