Christmas Tree

Found a lovely site here for the interested. http://www.allotment-diary.co.uk/index.html

Headmaster Savaged By Pupil He Had Caned

Tonight 8pm they're doing it all again......and this time I think its going to get Nasty!

I hope someone puts a claim in against you and your insurance costs go through the roof you scummy little man. why would someone put a claim in against me??? i wasnt driving. i wasnt even anywhere near the scene of the accident. you scummy little arsewipe! We've found CT's alter-ego Making a fool of yourself again

I would have said the Irish club, headquarters of Nust ? Anyway welcome to the board.

You bought one of these yet CT? :icon_lol: Brilliant

Well Percy goes to all the home games, I do as well, don't know about anyone else? Does all of the people who put Jose top of the pops go to the matches? Who knows? Am I right in thinking that as someone doesn't agree with your opinion then in your mind they mustn't go to the games? Because thats how your post looks to me. For me Jose's looked our best player but Nolan's been the most important, the goals which have turned one point into three like Preston away, the goals which have turned games like Sheff Wed or getting last minute winners against Doncaster, they are the games that get points on the board and points make prizes! Would Smithy have scored any of those chances? Would any of our midfielders? Nolan did. Yes he struggled at times, yes he might get the runaround next year, but for all the reasons explained he gets my vote. And thats no slight on Jose either, he's been top notch and his goal will probably be most peoples favourite goal this season. Good thread ending post

Sports Direct earnings on track after strong Easter Sales up 2.9% Gross profit up 7.9% Trading "robust" over Easter holidays LONDON, April 22 (Reuters) - Sports Direct (SPD.L), Britain's biggest sporting goods retailer, is on track to meet its full-year earnings forecast after robust trading over the Easter holidays, it said on Thursday. The group, controlled by Newcastle United soccer club boss Mike Ashley, said sales rose 2.9 percent to 214 million pounds ($330 million) in the nine weeks ended March 28, with gross profits climbing 7.9 percent to 82 million. "The retail division has seen robust Easter holiday trading against tough comparators and we look forward to a successful football World Cup both on and off the field," said chief executive David Forsey. Sports Direct, which has twice lifted its earnings guidance for the year ending April 25, said it remained confident of achieving its latest forecast for earnings before interest, tax, depreciation and amortisation of at least 160 million pounds. :icon_lol: All good news boys and girls.....Mikes getting richer

Football star Charles N'Zogbia was arrested yesterday for allegedly paying someone else to take his driving test. Suspicions were first raised at the £25,000-a-week Premier League player's compulsory theory exam several months ago. Staff with the Driving Standards Agency - currently involved in a major crackdown on the growing fraud - noticed that the man who turned up with N'Zogbia's provisional licence did not look like him. Yesterday the £6million Wigan Athletic winger, 23, was held by police as he arrived in person for his practical test. N'Zogbia's hopes of making England's World Cup squad rocketed when he scored a stunning injury-time winner in the 3-2 victory over Arsenal on Sunday. But last night he was being investigated further after being released on bail from Altrincham police station in Cheshire after questions by DSA investigators. He faces a maximum of 10 years in jail if he is charged and convicted. The man who allegedly pretended to be him has not yet been arrested, sources said. Greater Manchester police said: "At 8.30am officers working alongside the DSA arrested a 23-year-old man at Sale driving test centre on suspicion of fraud by false representation." It is understood Wigan Athletic will monitor any legal action against their star player before they decide on a course of action. Advertisement - article continues below » The DSA estimates that up to 8,000 people a year fraudulently obtain driving licences by hiring others to impersonate them. Some fraudsters have taken hundreds of tests across Britain for other people - charging up to £500 a time. They generally alter their appearance to look more like the provisional licence-holders. N'Zogbia, who was born at Harfleur in Normandy, has played for France's Under-21 team 13 times but snubbed a call-up to the country's full international side this season in the hope of switching allegiance to England. His career in the Premier League began in 2004 when the late Sir Bobby Robson signed him for Newcastle United from Le Havre. He became a big success with fans but decided to leave after a number of incidents soured his relationship with the club. The final straw came when former Newcastle boss Joe Kinnear insulted him in a live TV interview after a defeat by mispronouncing his name as Charles Insomnia. N'Zogbia vowed never to play for the club again under Kinnear and was transferred to Wigan in January last year for a £6million fee. His brilliant form has helped to keep Wigan above the relegation zone and convinced manager Roberto Martinez he can gatecrash England's World Cup squad for South Africa.

JOEY Barton has quashed mounting speculation over his future by claiming it is a "privilege" to play for Newcastle United. The Magpies midfielder has featured in the club's last six matches after recovering from a foot injury that sidelined him for the majority of the campaign, and provided a reminder of his ability with the perfectly-weighted through ball that led to Wayne Routledge's goal at Plymouth on Monday night. Barton's eye-catching performance at Home Park led to renewed speculation over his summer plans, with Kevin Nolan, Alan Smith and Danny Guthrie all having leapt above him in the pecking order during his enforced spell on the sidelines. But having benefited from Newcastle's support during a string of much-publicised troubles, the one-time England international is not about to turn his back on a club he feels proud to be a part of. "I am not going anywhere," said Barton, who is likely to miss out on a Championship winners' medal as a result of his limited involvement this season. "I love everything about this football club, every player here. "I'd be hard pushed to find a group of lads like it, a group of lads that I'd want to have a go with. This is them. "I've had a lot of chances here, and although it's been said before, I just want to prove how grateful I am by getting out there and playing football. "Injuries have hindered that a bit, but I'm humbled to be part of this achievement and humbled to be part of everything that is going to happen to this football club in the very near future. It's a privilege." Barton was a member of the Newcastle squad that crashed out of the Premier League 12 months ago, but having nurtured a powerful team spirit during their season outside the top-flight, the Liverpool-born midfielder feels the current squad is far superior to the one that struggled last season. For much of the current campaign, he has been on the outside looking in. But he has still seen more than enough to convince him that Newcastle's battling qualities will stand them in good stead as they attempt to survive next season. "We're in a much better position this time around to go into the Premier League," he said. "We've got some real, real strong characters, a real togetherness as a team. "It's probably the first time in my career I can look around and say I'm really happy to be in the trenches with every single one of them in the dressing room. There is not a set of lads like them. "Even with all the shenanigans and things that have been bandied about, people trying to stick spanners in the works - the lads have stayed together." That team spirit has carried Newcastle to their first domestic title since 1993, and a sold-out St James' Park will rise to acclaim the champions when they receive the Championship trophy in the wake of Saturday's home game with Ipswich. Having made only his seventh start of the season at Plymouth, Barton is desperate to be involved against Roy Keane's side, but admits his wider role in the title triumph has been peripheral at best. "The lads have laid all the foundations of what happened," he said. "I just helped put the chimney pot or the aerial on, if you like. Just the little end bit I was involved in. "I've been there in the background, willing the lads on. Im just humbled to be part of this squad of men and this achievement because I know people say we had the biggest squad but we still had to go out and win the league. "We've had some tough trips this season. We had 23 Cup finals away from home this year and when Newcastle come to town, you know everyone's going to be looking to take a scalp. "But the lads have been magnificent. They've done all the graft and hats off to them. I'm privileged to be part of it." Barton is not the only player hoping to play a more prominent role at St James' next season, as goalkeeper Fraser Forster has also turned his attentions towards the future as his loan spell at Norwich City nears its end. Forster has played an integral role in Norwich's promotion from League One, and while scouts from a number of Premier League clubs have been flocking to Carrow Road to watch him recently, the Hexham-born 21-year-old is desperate to succeed with the Magpies. "It's been a brilliant season for me," said Forster. "It's all part of my personal progression towards being a future Newcastle number one. "We're very strong for keepers at the minute, and I'm hoping to keep improving. As a local lad, I really want to make it at Newcastle, and I'm confident I can. "Steve Harper's had a fantastic season and I'm sure he'll carry that on into next season, but I'm just trying to close the gap on him and really push him for his place." Northern Echo Like the bit about the chimney pot

What a scare! Got to count your blessings in this life. Don't forget, where there's blame..........

No links anywhere? Is this just a joke?

Nothing rhymes with Nolan though. Rollin, Rollin, Rollin. We've got Kevin Nolan Keeps on putting Goals in Not Wideeeeeee! In all types of weather He's really rather clever Connecting with the leather Raw Hide!

David Cameron has cracked a joke after being hit by an egg while campaigning in Cornwall. The egg, thrown by a protester, hit the Conservative leader on the back. It happened during a visit to a college in Saltash. Sky's Joey Jones, who is with the Conservatives on the campaign trail, said Mr Cameron was not injured in the incident. "He was supremely relaxed about it," Jones said. In a separate incident, the Tory leader was confronted by a person in a giant chicken suit on Tuesday. Mr Cameron joked: "Now I know which came first - the chicken not the egg."

If he's replaced with a proper wide-man. Even then, our squad's a bit thin. Agreed.

what happened to the "knowledge" like? I have a crap memory.......... As most of my posts confirm.

Have to agree to disagree then skippy

It will be interesting to see how this pans out during the summer. Given the commonly quoted 15 mill budget, Ashley might just let him get on with it, however the best deal might have harmed him. It would also be interesting to know whether Hughton was infact responsible for the January dealings. Ie was Routledge his eye for a player or someone elses. If I was Ashley and If I was going to be commited to the club, my next appointment would be a very good football man running the operatin and possibly a dreaded director of football to help Hughton. What does Llambias do then? Fuck off back to Vegas

It will be interesting to see how this pans out during the summer. Given the commonly quoted 15 mill budget, Ashley might just let him get on with it, however the best deal might have harmed him. It would also be interesting to know whether Hughton was infact responsible for the January dealings. Ie was Routledge his eye for a player or someone elses. If I was Ashley and If I was going to be commited to the club, my next appointment would be a very good football man running the operatin and possibly a dreaded director of football to help Hughton.

WIth regard to jonas at Man U that was our first real look at him and we didn't "know him" then. I'm sure many hoped he was going to be the next ginola / Robert. I'm pretty sure that having watched him for two years if you re-watched that game now, his performance would not look as good. He totally struggled in the prem and a good world cup / sale would be the best outcome.

This is where managers earn their corn. He sees him week in week out and has to balance silly money against potential. If a silly offer came in and it allowed Hughton to get another one or two decent players then it's good business. Hopefully we won't be silly enough to let him go on the cheap, however I think he still appears a bit light weight for the rigours of the prem. The ideal scenario would be a long term contract and a loan spell in the championship.

FYP. and all the professional footballers in the league who voted him their player of the season

My mistake, I forgot that with Nolan every one of his important goals he dispossed the opposition, knocked a through-ball through for himself, dinked in the perfect cross then headed it home whilst the rest of the team stood by watching in awe. I'm sure you know what I mean but if you don't c'est la vie. It's just the way it is with Goalscorers and Goalkeepers.