Monkeys Fist

Hmm, I think your closest one without height restrictions is Carliol Street, about 3 minutes walk away. http://www.parkopedia.mobi/parking/carpark/carliol_square/ne1/newcastle/

Correct Davide.

Whilst it's a bit freaky for Phtevie to lust after a Granny, it's absolutely Yewtree for Bunter to be rubbing his mushroom over some student doctor. ( To be fair to Phtevie, though, Helen Mirren would still get it 5 ways from Sunday)

Which hotel you staying in mate?

"Hey Anne, why the long face?"

Was indeed.

John Dan? Nowt dodgy about that.

One of the best meals I've ever had was Rabbit and Snails , in Catalonia. And not a beard or check shirt to be seen

Spacka Dan?

You've also shit yourself with a similar gay abandon.

Daddy's Cock, the absolute epitome (google it, you thick mackem cunt), of the average sunderland fan- more excited about the prospect of us going down than they are worried about the virtual certainty that they will be coming with us. Whatever our future holds, thank fuck it doesn't have Hippo Heed involved in it.

Nothing you've said here is incorrect, bar the Ryder comparison. You could hit the keyboard with your knob end, and still make better copy than Wor Lee

The genuine answer to this is that a lot of us used to be. Personally, my last game was the Liverpool match immediately after Hughton was peddled, and I only went to that because an old friend who was also a plastic scouser had bought us a pair of tickets well in advance. I'd say that many of the lads on here that used to go religiously have packed in through a combination of utter disenchantment with the running of the club, and a change in personal priorities- mainly the production of the money-sinks aka kids Having said that, there are some lads on here who still go week in, week out,whilst still being utterly against the present regime-Happy Face springs to mind. I'm having a wee crisis of principle now though - my nipper, who's 5, has become madly obsessed with football in general, and NUFC in particular. He's been on at me for weeks now to go to the match, and I realise that I must put my feelings to one side and take my laddie to his first match some time soon. Won't be this season though. When we're in the Championship, I'll pick a home game I think we'll have a chance of winning, and take him to that, in the hope that his first time watching us is a good one- more fool me Will I fuck, though, give the Fat One a season ticket- that ship has long since sailed, even if I end up spending more on a game by game basis, I will not give the twat the satisfaction of having my money in advance, regardless of performance. All that being said, I'm still stupidly excited about the prospect of taking my son to his first NUFC game, if that makes me a moron, so be it.

Chez, go to the Lakes , go on AirB&B or something similar- you'll find somewhere that fits all your requirements for less than Centerparcs. As has been stated, it's a posh Butlins.

The only part of this long running shit-show I find depressing is the appointment of Benitez. It shows that we have/had the standing to still attract top notch personnel, but we just don't have the right people in the crucial positions to pull off these appointments at the right time. Rafa will fuck off when we go down, and nobody will blame him for doing so. The depressing part is that had he been appointed a few weeks previously, we would've probably stayed up, with a quality gaffer in place to oversee the huge rebuilding exercise necessary. As it is, we've just been teased, Jim Bowen style- " Let's have a look at what you could've won....." Incompetence on a scale unimaginable.

"Here, Tayls, sew a fucking button on that!"

"Planning" Someone please explain this to Penfold.

"Is it him again"

Red numbers. When all was right with the world

ouch

Were you parked outside a Chinese restaurant?

Power mad……