Monkeys Fist

Who’s this cunt?

Just tell her that male monogamy is what the Illuminati want, then get stuck in to her sisters.

Just seen this. Hell of a voice.

What’s your biggest ever lump of smeg, then?

And we all know how unlikely they are to change any time soon. Fucking great isn’t it?

Veni vidi defaecare via est.

I reckon he’d just scream and jump back in the fridge.

Shirley that’s its purpose?

Are you off your tits again?

I’ve done quite a bit of reading on Roman Britain, and the Roman names of places throughout the region. Newcastle obviously was Pons Aelius, its suburbs Wallsend and Benwell were Segedunum and Condercum, Corbridge was Corstopitum, then you’ve got places like Vindolanda that didn’t last through to the modern age. It’s weird that I’ve never seen the Roman name for sunderland listed in any book or paper on Roman Britain… I know they didn’t bother naming insignificant little settlements that served them no purpose, but that can’t be the case with such a cultural and industrial hub as sunderland , can it?

Renton - “ Whilst the data for clearing earwax is inconclusive, the risk of setting your head on fire is a positive 85%. “

Is that from Viz? Can I buy them from World of Wasps?

Aye. Tried all kinds of ear drops and whatever but nowt works better than cooled, boiled water with some salt in it and a fuck off big syringe. Once the main plugs come out I feel like that little deaf baby getting his implants switched on for the first time

Could’ve been worse- could’ve been £1270.

I got some water trapped in my ear whilst on holiday in Corfu back in 2004. Went to a doctor on the island to get the lugs jetwashed, and the things that came out were horrific. Like, you could probably tar a roof with it. Ever since, I’ve had to give em a blast every month or so and it’s both disgusting and fantastic- disgusting because of the amount, and colour, of the shit that falls out, and fantastic because I can hear again.

Res-erection.

Are they ever not?

Fyp

Defence like Penfolds blanket fort.

Me and Mrs. F. are rewatching the first series of True Detective. Fantastic stuff.

Tut tut tut.