Monkeys Fist

Transphobic. Reported.

League 1-1

RTG is their spiritual home, tbf.

2-1. Carroll hat trick.

Boo Tom! I didn’t get to use “ Now Go Home & Get Your Fuckin' Shinebox!” Bring back the Everton One

“One night, Derek Acorah sent us champagne. There was nothing like it. I didn't think there was anything strange in any of this. You know, a twenty-year-old kid with such connections. He was an exciting guy. He was really nice. he introduced me to everybody. Everybody wanted to be nice to him. And he knew how to handle it.”

Let me guess- One day some of the kids from the neighborhood carried your mother's groceries all the way home. You know why? It was outta respect.

Fair enough, you’ve probably never met them.

Biggest club on the planet In your own city, never mind anywhere else, you’re the Freeview club as opposed the Sky Sports club. I’m intrigued why you’ve chosen to come here and make a cunt of yourself as opposed to a Palace site, or a proper Liverpool club site? Has your lass just told she’s getting bucked raw by some Geordie lad, or was it you that got bucked raw by one of our lads? I’m mildly interested.

Let me guess, you have a beard, tattoos, and love your kids?

Said Woy, today.

Too easy. Must try harder.

You’re the sad cunt that signed up to another club’s board on a Saturday night, looking for a fight, not me. The onus is on you. Fire away Einstein, give it your best shot. You won’t though, because you can’t, because you don’t have the intelligence. You’re an Everton fan, ffs

If I thought for a minute that you’d be capable of a decent battle of wits, I would. But it let’s be honest here, you’re about as bright as a lump of coal… painted with vanta black. Be my guest though, Dave, have a go.

Thicker than whale spunk.

Foul going’s on in Kenya https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-africa-49290641

The former Gazza lookalike to his left obviously has B.O.

I thought you’d managed Ashford FC, tbh. Didn't realise you were a Sweaty.

Prius. You fucking sex God.

You fell for the sexy French accent trap, didn’t you? TS; “ Alreet pet, fancy a back scuttle?” TSFB; “ Oh mon cherie, donnez moi ton petit saucisson, comme un singe sauvage!” TS: “ Er, aye, nee bother pet, voulez vous couchez avec moi, ce soir, like?” TSFB: “ Mon minge est comme la tete de M. Trump dans une tornado” TS:” Fuckin’ mint! Clear the decks, I’m coming in !”

His arse exploded one time too many mid-flight and he got permanently grounded. I take it then, being French and what have you, that Mrs Trophyshy has a minge like Deano’s back garden?

If I had any control over the little cunts, I’d stop them, but I’m a shitty father The three year old, (who’s now 9) has weaponised his farts and uses them to great effect. My life is a shite, middle-class BBC comedy.

Fuck off, and post more, you absolute throbber.