Monkeys Fist

He always looks like he smells of whisky and Woodbines.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-edinburgh-east-fife-54030023

If you have a large group of boats piloted by numpties, each one produces a wake. When two wakes meet, you’ll get a little standing wave produced, with a smaller series of them eventually tailing off. If you multiply that effect, you’ll very quickly have a large number of big standing waves, and corresponding troughs. When the idiot boats, designed for flat water pleasure boating, plough on through this mess, they’ll drop in to the troughs, get hit by the waves, take on water, lose stability, get hit by another wave, take on more water, etc etc. If they had the most basic bit of sense they’d stagger the “parade”, and have the small boats go first, but these are Trump supporters we’re talking about. Fuck ‘em

“ In case of emergency; 1. Remain seated on your fat arse. 2. Scream. 3. Do not put on a Lifejacket, it’s what Big Gubmint wants you to do.

Presumably any Trumpist on a sunk boat will be a loser or a sucker in the eyes of The Tangerine One?

You’d struggle to get two cars in between those kegs, mind. ( Isn’t this pizza bloke a notorious cunt, btw?)

You incorrigible cock-fiend.

One way to draw attention away from the ankle tag.

I think we missed it 4 years ago too.

He’s got the forehead for it.

Oh, I dunno… ( their faces at 0:34 ).

We are so utterly and comprehensively fucked thanks to the Pig Fucker not having the stones to tell one wing of his party to fuck off. Best PM in my lunchtime.

Pvt. Heel Spurs will deny it, blame WWII on Obama, then have a cheeseburger.

I’m never watching darts again. ( I never watched it before, but I’m never watching it again).

I know you’re just ribbing me.

Grand Theft Arseholes.

I’ve, so far, resisted the urge to make the obvious boiler jokes, as they’re pretty much writing themselves. Crack on lads

It being mine and Mrs.F’s 22nd anniversary today, I went to Block and Bottle yesterday to splurge on steaks that come with a family tree of the cow, what it’s last meal was, and a playlist of it’s favourite music. Got a couple of fillets for the Fistlets as they’re fussy little shites regarding meat fat, and some rib-eyes, still on the rib, for Mrs.F. and I. Fuck me, they were unbelievably good- I didn’t fuck on with any sauces, other than pan juices reduced with white wine, as I wanted to taste the dead beast in all its glory. Served up with steamed Pink Fir Apple spuds, char-grilled courgettes and broccoli, and some mixed shrooms with herb butter. I know everyone eats rabbit food now, self-included Mon-Fri, but if you want some quality meat at a very reasonable price, go to these folks. Btw, their charcuterie is award winning and it’s fucking well deserved. They’ve recently moved to Heaton Rd, and they also stock some seriously good beers and wines. * cracks another Almasty can, falls over.

Happy Shed Day.

You should’ve actually “entered” a sock. Top prize, and the sack.

Pics or gtfo.