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Monkeys Fist

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Everything posted by Monkeys Fist

  1. I haven’t watched it, you throbbing arse-grape.
  2. Btw, I’m not denying that some people have acted like utter selfish cunts during all of this, but the Government had a ready-made source* of who/how many that would be to mitigate against it. *Roughly 17.4 million of them.
  3. Yep, it’s all our fault this time around. Follow our muddled, constantly changing, inadequate rules, or guidelines, (we’re not prepared to say which), or reap the consequences, plebs.
  4. Oh, a Danish Mackem! Slikke min kærlighedspumpe.
  5. Pubs are an easy target, which is why, I think, they’ve been so keen to get them open. Only a relatively small proportion of the population has been going to pubs since they reopened, with, generally, very good measures in place - cashless transactions, sign-in for track and trace, strict distancing ( generally). Pubs aren’t the source of this, the most obvious to me is supermarkets- no sign-ins, until a few days ago, no mandatory masks, totally disregarded distancing ages ago. Everyone needs to use them. This is where it’s spreading. But the big supermarket chains have more sway with the Torys than breweries, so they’ve been left alone.
  6. What I find interesting about this whole 2nd wave is the angle that’s being punted throughout the MSM ( sorry Gloomy ), laying blame for it firmly at the door of the public. I firmly believe that a government led wholly by the scientific advice would’ve had this under much better control, by being far stricter in the first instance with their lockdown measures. Since they weren’t, as they were probably distracted by working out how they and their pals could hoover up some tidy profits from it, here we are facing a 2nd wave, with the same reluctance to stamp it out hard resulting in a far longer, and more economically damaging resurgence. But this time, it’s our fault, and I can guarantee that students and the young folk will be painted as the villains this time around- it’s already starting. Obvioulsy, these are just my musings on the whole shitshow, but even a basic bastard like me can see the simplicity of how to effectively deal with this. Stop the spread of the virus, by strict lockdown, and we’ll soon be safe on our lovely little island. I’m frankly amazed that the racist cunts haven’t jumped on this as an “oven ready” excuse to implement a 100% ban on filthy foreign types coming in to our sceptred isle, but as I said, they’ll be too busy making blood money out of it to realise their “principles” can be legitimised briefly. Rant over, as you were lads
  7. Also, it’s funny that they’re all whining about being tracked and their data being sold… on fucking Twitter.
  8. It’s funny how the conspiracy nuts dismiss experts and scientists as “ all a part of it”, until one pops up that agrees with them, and then it’s “ listen to him, he knows what he’s talking about”. This isn’t a pop at you @wykikitoon, btw, irs aimed at the angry mentalists in the replies to that thread.
  9. Shocking! It’s a lottery as to whether you get a test easily or not.
  10. Shocking! It’s one set rules for the elite, while the rest of us can get to fuck.
  11. One of my mam’s uncles played alongside Bob Paisley for Bishop Auckland, winning the Amateur FA Cup in 1939 with him. His last words were “ Tell essembee -Fulwell End 1972, I was there!” * one of the above statements may be “alternative facts, covfefe”.
  12. “ The Mountain Gorilla has the smallest penis size of all the primates, at 1.5 inches erect”. Having watched these clownshoes, the above statement is clearly no longer true.
  13. You’ll have to let the shite dry on the paper first, otherwise it’ll be a smoky, extra pungent hellscape. (You can thank Ray Mears for that- tubby-but-practical beats piss-drinking Grylls, every time )
  14. And mid-flight anal explosions.
  15. £3:00 for 752 pages.… Asda Boldon sell Andrex 4 packs, 800 sheets in total for £2:50.
  16. Didn’t realise you were so homophonic.
  17. Great game- plough through chapter 1 and it really comes to life.
  18. It’s every thoroughly depressed man for himself!
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