Monkeys Fist

Ah man, what a bummer. Van Halen were one of my favourite bands when I was a young shaver, their album Diver Down was the soundtrack to an incredible summer spent camping and climbing in the Lakes with my mates and our girlfriends. Eddie was a phenomenal player, not just at the fiddly-diddly stuff he’s famous for- he had some knockout riffs and their albums up to and including 1984 showed a huge variety of styles. This is one of my favourite VH songs, which instantly takes me back to the care-free summer in Borrowdale, climbing and shagging RIP Eddie, fucking legend. ( We’ll diplomatically say nowt about the post-Dave Lee Roth band ).

Plenty, hopefully.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-54436575 Ouch.

Isn’t he “ North East football” correspondent? Why isn’t he also getting frothy about Gandaft and his imminent takeover of the tramps, or does that not get him clicks because no cunt cares?

It’s important to give the serfs the odd crumb from the Top Table We’ve been more than generous with the sweaties with our North Sea oil, after all.

FYP.

The antibody cocktail Trump is having was made by Regeneron, who used human embryo stem cells in the research stage of its development. Wonder what his “ human life begins at conception” Supreme Court religious nut nominee thinks about that, not to mention his pro-life mob?

What did he do to deserve looking like a surprised, drunk tortoise?

How about they arrest Johnson and his boss for their criminal handling of the whole thing?

Imagine getting tucked in at night by Savage- he’d catch a hangnail on the duvet, drop to the floor screaming, and be demanding a red card for the bedding. Also, he’s a cunt.

“ NONSENSE NONSENSE NONSENSE- VOTE!”

He’s only 42- wants to lay off the sauce, he looks about 60.

Suck it up, nippers.

They don’t have to- if you take the average weekly wage of a PL player as £50,000, if they see out that contract for just 5 years, they’ve made £13 million. And that’s just average players. Insane.

No one tell him

You’ll very likely enjoy the Shardlake then, he’s not Fat Henry’s biggest fan.

I’ve read Pompeii- I really enjoyed it, but then I do nerd out on historical novels. If you haven’t read them already, I’d recommend the Shardlake series by CJ Sansom. They’re set in England during the reign of Henry VIII, and the titular character, Matthew Shardlake, is a lawyer hired to investigate shenanigans and chicanery amongst the various swine in Henry’s London. Very much like Harris and Cornwell.

That’s a fantastic, depressing, and terrifying article. The scenario ( towards the end), where they could have three legitimate claimants to the presidency is mental. Also, bonus points for using the word “pettifoggery”.…

Do you know Cleopatra?

So’s this.

Since this thread is all about comebacks…

Direct quite from BBC website; “Sean Dyche is wearing an excellent coat but he's really not a happy man at all. He's exasperated down there. Exasperated and soaked through. Wetter than an otter's pocket.” Do you think they realise they’ve just called him a cunt?