Monkeys Fist

What a cunt- he’s not even housebarrassed about it.

I posted one of my favourite shite ( and a bit lacist) jokes somewhere on here the other day. Q: What do you call a Chinese Lass with a food processor on her head? A:

The Barley Mow was similar- cracking boozer in it’s day.

Is it Chinese?

Let’s just send Thoughts and Prayers to the 100,000+ bereaved families, that’ll do the trick.

Sarah Beeny “This double-fronted property is well-maintained but needs its back doors kicking in. “

That’ll be on some Props blokes’ CV. First Job- Apprentice Shit Sculptor on The Cack Whisperer.

If you look in the toilet and say “ Cunt” three times he’ll turn up though.

Imagine the thought process she had where she came up with the gimmick- “ I’ll sift through fat bastard’s shite”

Personally, I think once BRAAAP! gets round to sacking COVFEFE we’ll end up with someone like PENG.

Speaking of house shows, that bald Tory cunt from Location x3 is currently picking up wedge for doing Wickes ads, where he repeats the made-up word “housebarrasment” ad nauseum. I hope a wall falls on him.

From a place that sold the same “doctorate” in the same subject to one of her fiercest critics for $60.… in the name of his dead cat. If @TheGingerQuiff reads the “directions for use” leaflet on his next box of Kamagra, he’ll be as medically trained as McKeith.

Then jump in a helicopter and kill family and friends?

For the sake of those of us without nursing care, explain who (and why) TOT refers to?

“ I mean, they scored more goals than us. How do you expect us to win when they do stuff like that… you know me, I’m never one to look for excuses.…”

What do you call a Chinese lass with a Kenwood Chef on her head?

@Tom Sorted.

You’re a funny guy.

I was just in the process of typing, “we’ll just have pissed them off by scoring”, but they’ve saved me the bother. Cheers lads👍

edit for clarity.

I think what stings the most about this is that it was so unexpected - none of us, not least the owner and chairhamster, could’ve predicted that a bloke who can’t even keep his own tits from dropping would struggle to keep a perfectly capable, well-drilled mid-table squad from turning to mackem levels of shite. It’s not like his previous form, mirrored at every single club he’s ruined, would give them a hint.

Yes edit; There’s not a vas deferens between them…

Most people have a pie or chips, but whatever floats your boat.

That would imply effort on his behalf.

Rather than watch this, I’m forcing a rusty knitting needle up my Japsy. Prediction; Faced with stiff opposition, ultimately the end collapse will be bloody awful…