Monkeys Fist

Arrogant wanker. And Santana… And Ronni James Dio... and Hendrix… Alan Parsons can fuck off too

Can’t scratch your own balls though- tiny arms.

It’s not bad for running around in a T-Rex suit.

Dumb gifs?

It’s entirely believable that Johnson has Ferengi knees.

I understand his band weren’t everyone’s cup of tea, but it seems churlish not to recognise his contributions to world peace.

Before his political career.

Run!

You will not pass!

Here you go @Tom, one to warm up the digits this morning

Tbf, half the band was called Van Halen, as his brother Alex was the drummer.

Ah man, what a bummer. Van Halen were one of my favourite bands when I was a young shaver, their album Diver Down was the soundtrack to an incredible summer spent camping and climbing in the Lakes with my mates and our girlfriends. Eddie was a phenomenal player, not just at the fiddly-diddly stuff he’s famous for- he had some knockout riffs and their albums up to and including 1984 showed a huge variety of styles. This is one of my favourite VH songs, which instantly takes me back to the care-free summer in Borrowdale, climbing and shagging RIP Eddie, fucking legend. ( We’ll diplomatically say nowt about the post-Dave Lee Roth band ).

Plenty, hopefully.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-54436575 Ouch.

Isn’t he “ North East football” correspondent? Why isn’t he also getting frothy about Gandaft and his imminent takeover of the tramps, or does that not get him clicks because no cunt cares?

It’s important to give the serfs the odd crumb from the Top Table We’ve been more than generous with the sweaties with our North Sea oil, after all.

FYP.

The antibody cocktail Trump is having was made by Regeneron, who used human embryo stem cells in the research stage of its development. Wonder what his “ human life begins at conception” Supreme Court religious nut nominee thinks about that, not to mention his pro-life mob?

What did he do to deserve looking like a surprised, drunk tortoise?

How about they arrest Johnson and his boss for their criminal handling of the whole thing?

Imagine getting tucked in at night by Savage- he’d catch a hangnail on the duvet, drop to the floor screaming, and be demanding a red card for the bedding. Also, he’s a cunt.

“ NONSENSE NONSENSE NONSENSE- VOTE!”