Monkeys Fist

Are you anywhere near the flooded areas mate? Hope you and yours are all ok. 👍

Renton wakes up and saunters out to the verandah of his favourite lodge for a leisurely breakfast, spots a group of “fucking tourists!” a mile away approaching Renton Towers …

The one with Gary Oldman as Sid? Ive seen it, ages ago, but have no memory of it good or bad. Hope that helps

Just been and got some Almasty and Full Circle cans for this evening’s BBQ chez Fist. oops

He’s certainly that. 😉

Canny isn’t it? Bit cheeky price wise, but it’s literally on my doorstep so I’ve no complaints.

Careful on your pc- it’s loaded with viruses.

Can’t delete it if I never had it.

There’s a fatal flaw in your plan

Renton letting his porn preferences slip out here …

Both of Steve Coogan’s brothers are radio presenters… aha!

Nice - just hoovered the fridge in double quick time.

Eldritch horror.…

It’s got me intrigued too Is it hot or cold? How fucking runny is this custard she’s necking? Does she neck pints, like an angry docker, or have gentle sips from a wine glass? At what point does runny custard stop being custard and just become thick milk? Which poor bastard has to unclog her toilet?

There’s a mental image I could’ve done without. The addition of the word custard in the strapline turns this from your bog-standard celebrity bog roll fodder in to something David Lynch would base a film on.

Looks like some swine has hacked Dave’s weblogvlogblog NewcastleNatter.co.uk

Goodfella Dave ( Have you moved to Merseyside? )

This is mint. Anyone here pay for their online Grot?

So, I have a seat, but I’m worried some random twat might nick it- do I? 1- Sit in the fucking thing, ending the problem 2- Leave my precious seat unattended, go down to the concourse, and kick some cunt in the head

I feel a bit bad for all three of Gloria de Piero.

Quiff’s ex loves a bit of BBC, according to xHamster.

Err, no. He’s from Consett- rural Mackem.

Dulux OneCoat. Shit was amazing

I decorated my entire house to Shpongle’s entire discography. Made a shit job 100% more bearable.