Monkeys Fist

The tip. Always the tip.

Sounds like you might be a bit down… you should speak to a Mental health professional.

Do you go gusset-to-nose or gusset-to-mouth? 🍅

@Howmanheyman, how you’ve described how you were is very similar to me. I’m on “that American shite” Sertraline It does the trick for me, got my mojo back. I’ll be honest, I was laughing again before I took the first one after reading the list of possible side-effects; erectile dysfunction, itching, INCREASED LIKELIHOOD OF SUICIDAL THOUGHTS! wtf You’ll be glad to know that those are very rare, only affecting males in the 40-50 age bracket, night shift workers, ugly as a punched walrus. You’ll be fine

#cans

Someone dug him up by the looks of it.

Mama Mia! Here we go again with the puns.

Wouldn’t that be rape, though. What a can… sorry, tin of worms.

Gloom, spitting his taddies out…

Filthy spitter.

Given recent discussions , FMOP.

Show off.

Nice one, if you get to raise the subject and he shuts you down, drop it for tonight but don’t give up, keep mentioning it and he’ll get the message- sounds like he knows he needs to do something anyway, so fingers crossed. 👍

Competition from DJ Gloom?

FYP

Go for it mate, but, why wait- that’s just putting things off, which was what I used to do, and then never actually doing them. Ring your GP tomorrow and you’ll be rocking around the Christmas tree and giving it Fa-La-La-La on the 25th. Do this, if not for your sake, then for ours, please ( you could try Gloom’s idea of having a bender, but you’d have to go to Time Square and look sexy, so maybe try that in summer… yes, reported myself).

Aren’t we a happy bunch?

I was the lowest I’ve ever been a few months back, and had a chat with my GP who put me on Happy Pills and I was offered counselling. I took the pills but didn’t bother with the tree-hugging and over the course of a week or two the difference was very noticeable. Give it a try, for a month or two, and if it’s not for you, no harm done, but if it works like it did for me, fuck me- what a difference you’ll see. I wasn’t having highs or lows, I was just flat- typically northern, I “felt nowt”, nothing, no joy, no sadness, no interest, nowt. Now, I’m like a teenage lass, bursting out into song at the sight of a kitten. But, aye, give it a try Renton man.

I honestly think with cunts like Sourness it’s down to bitter jealousy (of the money), and an inability to accept the game is different to their day- they think modern footballers are paid too much and are fucking pussies. They’re not wrong, but they’re so far removed, themselves, from ordinary people that they think they’ve missed out on the gravy train by “only” having £millions in the lower double-figures.

If he’s not going out, hitting the sauce, and sleeping late/rising late, sounds like he could be suffering from depression. Other than what Renton said above, there’s ultimately not much you can do unless he decides for himself he needs help. It’s a bit of a Catch 22- if he gets some help/meds, he’ll probably cut down the drinking, but he’ll not get that help if he’s drinking too much and leaving the MH untreated. Some people respond to the arm round the shoulder, some people need to be told to “sort your fucking life out”. You probably know which type he is better than us.

Just watched the first 30 seconds or so… Anyone who can get Newcastle fans thinking Pardew is a canny bloke needs to have a proper look at themselves. What a fucking wanker he is.

If it’s not some saucy strumpet getting hands-on it’s not real physio. Which is probably why my back sounds like a bag of dry sticks.

Eh? How’s he taking this long? Are your walls 6ft thick or something?