Monkeys Fist

I’m not a gambling man, but wanna bet? They’ll be wanking themselves daft.

Your gaff must reek of piss This has got the scouse mackems getting a fucking pasting written all over it.

How can you not be sure if it’s you? Have you forgotten what you looked like as a kid?

He’d be arrested if he did that now

Found a young CT and his Mam.

Alan Gowling? Is he chucking the peanuts in to the crowd or catching them?

I’m surprised he’s allowed to bring alcohol in to the hostel mind, even if it is just in the canteen.

What’s red and invisible? No cherry tomatoes

How’s your minge, though?

As puns go, this is pretty Shiite

Roman Abramovich: Premier League disqualifies Chelsea owner as director of club https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/60720343

I watched a documentary on BBC4 about how ship's hulls are held together. It was riveting…

You’re on fire tonight

Has our “greatest player” become a conspiracy theory spouting covidiot whilst simultaneously showing himself to be thicker than a Boxing Day turd? I don’t think he has. We win- get fucked

Go on son!

Who’d have thought, 12 months ago, that we’d be wiping our arses with £100 pound notes and Chelsie literally don’t have a pot to piss in? It’s fucking glorious

You’ll need this if you’re planning on bringing him back

Totally forgot Sqiudward played for us.

This is no surprise, since Only Fools and Horses is also a fucking pile of wank.

And he’s only 18.