Monkeys Fist

Is she a prolific home cook?

Tricky one this- we need a win combined with a good, high energy, convincing performance. So for that reason, I’m going to break with tradition and say.… 5-0. 4 Minteh o.g. 2 a-piece from Isak.

Things that make you go…

Shouting across the pitch to his marra in opposite stand, ” Eeya, Mick, me cheeyse slice looks like a Lion!”

Tbf to the Morlock, most match going Marras won’t be used to any noise at the ground, spare the odd grunt as someone pinches one off.

When I didn’t work in an office, I found a standard reply of a picture of some pig’s bollocks with “ HOW ABOUT THEM APPLES?” written in red capitals ensured I never got another. ( some or all of this maybe be alternative truth).

Someone’s just salty that Queen Victoria sent their Great Grandad to H.M.P Oz for stealing a rat for the pot.

Gentle reminder… we’ve done this already.

Six months ago, when Albert’s brand new LG TV and Dobly soundbar got repo’d because of his raging coke habit… Now, new telly, new speakers, new nose…

and

An office?

Years ago, when I used to take groups to Corby Crags, on the Alnwick->Rothbury road, I’d fill them full of shite about Edlingham Castle, saying it was the worlds only castle built on a bridge. It looks like this when viewed from the east Incidentally, you can see it on the Hobbit Movie Poster , if you zoom in to the right of Gandaft.

Why would they put the Tyne Bridge on top of the stadium?

Gemmill getting his Robespierre wig on…

Woke up just as the 2nd half was starting. Should’ve had a lie-in THE SCENE- a woman hovers in the doorway of a home in London, just after her husband hears the full time whistle … HRH Mrs. Gloom- “ What was the score then dear?” HRH The King -“ It was a draw pet, 2 weeks until my next match thread… Long Live The King!” The woman melts back to the kitchen and sits down…

My favourite Blondie track Excellent as usual from Elvis Ramone.

Two absolute stone-cold classics… … and Errol

Renton, you’re in deep cover over there- how many posts have the Morlocks made about the obvious match fixing going on there with the Leeds keeper clearly being paid off by The Pocket Money Billionaire? Mag behaviour tbh.

Does the Throne not have lumbar support, Your Maj?

I pulled the intercostal muscles under my left tit the other day whilst digging out a new patio area in my garden. Random movements produce a feeling like someone has stuck a molten iron rod through my chest. I’m due to start my 4 day driving shift tonight too

My old man had a mixed history when it came to cars- he owned, at various times, a Triumph TR6, several Minis, a Saab 69, Ford Anglia, Lancia Beta, but he fucked it big time by buying not one, but two Austin Allegros.

Mrs. Gloom after nearly a week of “Royalty”…

Adam Pearson; Toonpack, if I tried to say the v-word, you’d drown and my tongue would strangle itself. Let’s say you had a jab, yeah?

Q;What does her minge smell like? A; Herbie.