Monkeys Fist

If any of them could read they’d be banging their kids double quick and saying “ it’s fine, says so on the sign marra!”

Didn’t one of them once say that he always took pocketfuls of cheese to the game? It might even have been in the same thread as the crisp shaped like a lion?

This might be a gathering of the Micks. “ Eeya owa Mick Jnr! When’s Unkal Mick coming?” ” Daint kna- ‘e said he ‘ad to meet Basic Mick at Totnum Court Road - he’d lent Basic is trainers and yellow trackie” ” Totum Court Road? Is thar’in London?” ” Daint knaa…” ” Ah hate the mags” ” Aye” ” Ah wish Big Mick and Little Mick were hea “ ” Aye- have the got tellys on the nonce wing?” ” Daint knaa…” “ FTM!” ” Aye”.

Looks like Gandaft has been sending group messages about accommodation. #freshairb&b #smellslikehome #heronfoods #statues #flag #fence

Wonder why they didn’t get the train from sunderland, hmm?

“ I’m sorry Mr. Methven, 41% of a ticket is not enough to let you in”.

If we estimate the width of his head to be 20cm, then apply the formula V = A³, to find the volume of a cube, we find that Jenas has a mighty 8,000㎠ of absolutely fuck all inside his head.

I wonder if Charlie and Stu will show up to watch their investment?

No way the BBC will just drop the predictions now that Droopy has finally heard from his accountant that he’s filled his coffers sufficiently. They’ll need a replacement but they must be- ex-pro inflated sense of self able to talk absolute shite absolute weapon. So

If only they’d opened a fans pub…

How the fuck is she employed? She must have hinges on her teeth.

“ Couldn’t get a ticket- shagged my sister instead “

Give them to the lass having a shit in the fountain, she’ll need to wipe her knees.

Nah…Wraith is 100% Jaffa

I know a lass from Cramlington who spoke like a Shields fishwife, she’s lived in Florida for 20 years and speaks like a native now, also, a Canadian lad who’s lived over here for a similar time, still got a thick Canuck accent. I lived in France for 10 years, spoke French with a local accent because it’s how I learned it, spoke English with my Newcastle accent - I had to slow it down and lose a lot of the slang to make myself understood to the Ozzies and Yanks when I worked with them, but kept the accent. My point is some people keep it, some lose it, some end up with a mix, so what?

What’s the dirt on this reply?

I’d never have had you down as a Sir John mind.

No we fucking don’t.

You’re right, I wouldn’t want to hear Alf Stewart “dropping the kids off at the pool”, ya flamin’ galah.

What, instead of hanging around the work mensroom listening to geriatric actors farting?

Sounds like you had a lucky escape tbh https://dai.ly/x2nxwip

Assuming those are normal sized chicken teats on the box, how are you going to get 6litres of sauce on there?

When did Trump get back on Twatter?

How do you grill health?