Monkeys Fist

I think your sitter crew, who seem obsessed with standers buttering their cheeks, need to improve their poo health* Having, in general, Aces, my butter is like it’s just come out of the fridge Again, Berb knew the score * copyright by the insane shit hamster

Berb knew the score.

As much as the white houses look pretty and that, it looks like a barren place tbh. ( not surprisingly, given its history). I’d say there’s better places in Greece to spend a fortnight in, and then have an overnighter on Santorini to keep Mrs W happy. (I’m available for more holiday-based marriage counselling at a very competitive rate. )

And so it begins… Premier League titles can be won by any team with determination, talent, and the backing of oil-rich nation states. But the true prize of being the one team known as “United” is open to a select few, the current holder of which is about to taste the bitterness of loss. ( If I’m absolutely honest, I couldn’t give a shit about us being the United- the whole thing is massively disrespectful to all the other teams who are xxx Utd, it’s more about Manure losing that ridiculous status for good, as it would drive home the fact that they’re now has-beens

Oh aye, if it all went tits up, I’d just go back to what I had before. If I get a year or so of free access to everything for £30-£40, that’s a gamble I’m willing to take. You’d spend more buying a round of drinks tbh, so it’s a no-brainer really.

Chez was the model we should all look up to

Proof that coke has been the drug of choice in the entertainment industry for decades.

I know this is clickbait nonsense, but Shearer playing in this side, under Howe, would break his own records.

He’ll let every raging, right wing fucknugget ( i.e. Trump), radge cunt and gammon back on for a few months to rile up the plebs and raise some free publicity for his new toy, then he’ll gradually fuck them back off and probably sell it to Bezos in a year or two.

Aye, Bruno, Joe and Miggy are rightly getting big love, but Trippier is one of the catalysts of our turnaround imho, and fully deserves every plaudit he gets. Fucking love the bloke, which, considering I didn’t really get him before he joined us, shows how little I know, and how bloody good he is. I reckon he’s already on the level of Rob Lee, Speed, Albert etc as far as importance to the team combined with popularity with the fans. When we eventually/inevitably win the FA cup, then the League, I hope he’s the one to lift the cup as Captain.

Cheers. I’m off tomorrow so I’ll look their pricing up between “ doing some research” and cooking some mad shit for tea.

Hörse Teethengrüber seems to have aged about 20 years since he joined the Wall Pushers.

Right then chaps, I started reading through this thread, ears perked up at the mention of free HD Grumble channels on page 1, then I rapidly lost the will to live. So, with that preamble done, down to business. I’m a fucking Luddite when it comes to this lark, but my brother has just shown me his new set up, run from a Firestick, which gives him access to all Sky, BT, AppleTV, Amazon Prime, Netflix, Disney, etc etc all live Premier, Italian, Spanish, German, French, footy etc etc. Basically all the tellys. £35-£40 yearly. Name of the app is a three letter word meaning large, starts with B, ends with G , with the first prime number in between. Assuming this is as good as it looks, I’d be looking for a broadband and landline only deal, currently with Virgin for tv phone and broadband at £66 p.m. Before I go all in, any pitfalls I should be aware of, and any recommendations for best supplier for Broadband and landline only in NE12.

Are they buoycotting petrol yet?

We should have a word with Wor Flags and get this done as a quiet nod to our polydactyl chums down the road. Watch the fewm

…Whilst missing the fact that, even under our shittiest manager in decades, with a demoralised and disjointed team, we still beat them.

BBC post-match interview with Howe. Newcastle United 4-0 Aston Villa: Eddie Howe praises 'outstanding' Magpies https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/av/football/63438525 The man’s a class act- he studiously avoids mention of Villa’s shithouse time-wasting in the first half ( although those steely, blue, knicker-melting laser eyes tell the us he thinks they’re cunts ), heaps praise on his players and staff, a study in professional focus and determination.… … until the end when Miggy’s worldies are mentioned, and even Super Ed has a laugh.

Aye, that’s the point.

Goodnight Board Mam. 💖

It also gives me great pleasure to have posted that in the match thread where we, yet again, fucking destroyed the Beige. Who’s their next Messiah?

That’s the best bit about this whole ride- it’s just the beginning. Howe has already imperiously pissed on everyone’s expectations and timelines of us becoming a side to be reckoned with, and he’s only going to get better in the foreseeable future for us. 12 months and a few players on from almost certainly plummeting down the Championship under Bruce, we’re realistically eyeing a top 4 finish. It’s fucking majestic.