Monkeys Fist

*sighs.

Niiiiice. Is it white, aye?

Ffs

Offside, ffs

You been going through his bins?

This is how The Queen used to ask for grapes… … as you were lads

Who?

They’re big Spaniels with a hipster tache More likely to tell you about the latest craft beer then trip over it’s own arse* *based purely on my spaniel, who is thicker than Therese Coffeys ankles.

Aye, the mouse was gutted to get a smaller one…

They’ll be introducing Reygis Le Briys to the Magic Roundabout soon then… Including caretakers, 33 managers since Monkeys Heed. 21 without counting caretakers.

I know nowt about her, but given his history of rape and unprovoked violence, she could well be on the receiving end of it herself. It’s incredibly common for domestic violence victims to feel unable to leave. Not saying she is a victim, but it wouldn’t be shock if it turned out she was.

Takes me 10 minutes to drive to work. Tonight, on the way, three separate times, had to swerve to avoid daft cunts, dressed head to foot in black, on bikes, no lights. All on unlit sections of road, but that had a path they could’ve ridden on. I’m beginning to think Darwin might have been wrong. Also just realised, none of them even had a rear reflector- isn’t that standard on a bike? You’d have to purposely remove it. Cuuuuuuuuunts ✅

In a rare moment of kinship with our Medieval Marra’s down the road, I’m going to have to ask you to explain The Wheel to me?

Took me a while to realise the Aldi checkout lass in the clip was Lauren Laverne.

Both him Phil Jupitus share the attributes of being comedians that aren’t remotely funny, and a belief that the can “do” a Geordie accent.

According to my favourite social media, librarians in their forties are very popular.

Drove through a full-on blizzard this morning at about 3 - from south of Nottinghamshire to Durham. Snow was hitting the screen faster than the wipers could clear it. No broken bones though.

Did she pass?

Have they all got earplugs to protect their hearing from your shirts?

Tbf, the amount of lost/confused/dead old people, pissed and injured twentysomethings, screaming sunburnt kids , and pregnant teenagers he’d have to deal with in Rake Lane would make it seem like a nice lie-in compared to repping in Benidorm.

He’s been toed in the chest though.

11? That’s nowt compared to the chapters and chapters we posted on here when Beyonce Getoncefree wiggled her butt at the SoS back in …whenever?

Runs in the family… Here’s Gemmill’s mental older sister, Doctor Copro Feelya.

So, to add to the rat panic, Mrs. F. got stuck in traffic this morning and broke down. Rang the AA who asked “ Is it over heating” She said “ No, it’s in Waalka you posh cunt!”