Monkeys Fist

It’s about to get tasty- you want some you fahckin’ slaaag???

Lest we forget…

As if they wash the sheets in a Travelodge.

Is there a Bon Scott missing from that table?

Shenanigans and baby wipes at Cobalt Travelodge Lacey Amour defends filming porn video at Travelodge https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-tyne-64261482

Could this be the year Gemmill finally gets the hang of this relegation prediction business?

I’ll take that as a compliment

Slow death as the little freaks had to keep stopping for a rest.

Insane that mind. They were all pugs too …

I think I gave him a new one, Flight or Shite response, and what have you.

Speaking of German Shepherds, I got attacked by one today. Stood at some bloke’s door, 7a.m. when the neighbour, who’s door was right beside, opened his door and let this furious beast, all teeth and anger, out. Straight up, paws on my chest, going for a face breakfast. I managed to grab it’s collar and get it away, then twisted it to choke the fucker and George Floyded it. Then the fucking owner had a go at me saying I was hurting his dog! Fuck me, it’s not the first time I’ve had to choke an angry bitch, but it was a bit early in the day for that kind of nonsense

Aye, commas are the difference between helping your uncle, Jack, off a horse, and lifelong trauma.

Duchess of Roker would like a word.

Scripted by Bob Mortimer too.

Just how her Dad liked ‘em.

Tits.

When they say “ erect” a statue, they mean it

The two lads who’ll be drawing things to an end are called Curt an’ Rod.

Glazers out! Sorry, wrong club.

They’ll be in a lot of pane, tbf.

First their club turned in to a Clown’s Shoe, then they took away the Air Show, and now, this! Sunderland's National Glass Centre set to move over costly repairs https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-tyne-64250082