Monkeys Fist

I worked at the Calvert Trust between the ages of 16-18, and there was a lad used to come fairly regularly. He was about 30, 6ft+, ginger as Gemmill and several slices short of a full loaf. Funny as fuck though, and he knew he was He used to call bollocks “Dumbartons” and when we’d take him on trips and visits he’d delight in pointing at some bloke’s package and shouting, at max decibels, “ Look at the fucking Dumbartons on him!” So, anyway, ever since I’ve never been able to hear or read the word Dumbarton without thinking of Buster Gonad and his unfeasibly large testicles. Thank you for listening, tune in next week for more genital-related jocular tales.

Game on lads ! “ Fuck Off Plebs!” ” Line My Pockets” ” We Hate You” crack on.

Milburn’s getting a bit uppity- asked for salt, vinegar and HP sauce on his Fish and Chips after he got the bus home. Money’s ruining the game.

South Yorkshire, innit blud?

Mrs. W. -“ But Wykiki love, we’re here in t’Alps, surrounded by mountains ( we’ve got bigger ones back home), it’s just dumped fresh powder on t’slopes, why ist tha’ so miserable?” Wykiki- “ Lookit t’Blackburn folk, all drunk and loud, it’s ruined, ah say, ruined!”

It’s amazing that they got so much detail on something 3 inches high.

Alexander Eeeeeeee-sak.

Are you saying he’s the Anti-Gemmill?

Big lass then?

Been a MLF since before he was born.

Rention, listen to Fish.

As if that isn’t bad enough, Sammy, the realisation that this Stone Cold Classic is 30 years old might just finish you.

‘Appen.

Yorkshired YP.

Bigmouth Strikes Again if they’re not a Radiohead fan.…

Hmmm, is there something you’re not telling us Gemmill/Basil?

If I want to see bouncy tiddies I’m not going on Netflix. Better storylines on my site too.…

You confused us with your Mumsnet account again?

This was my little Grandad at 40.

The speech prepared for Nixon in the event that Armstrong and Aldrin didn’t make it back is pretty chilling. https://www.archives.gov/files/presidential-libraries/events/centennials/nixon/images/exhibit/rn100-6-1-2.pdf

It started in 1932, so can’t blame the Nazi’s for this one- just good ‘ole boys getting their racism on.

Have you seen that Aussie bloke who won the lottery back in the 90s, so the local news had him go back to the store and re-enact buying a ticket for their report, and, of course, he won again. ( just found the clip - lucky bastard doesn’t begin to describe his story )

It’d be the one where they say the US Public Health department left 300 black men with syphilis untreated for over 40 years in order to “study the disease.” Oh, no, hang on, that’s not a conspiracy theory because it happened.

Not to mention that rockets don’t work in a vacuum.