Monkeys Fist

Get well soon Wykiki… …Soft shite

So, at 7:49pm tonight an asteroid 40-90 metres wide , which was only discovered last month, will pass between the moon and earth, missing us by 175,000km- in planetary terms, that’s not just a close shave, that’s waxing our nuts. According to the BBC, it’ll return in 2026 and miss us, ominously though, nowt about 2029 https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-65061818 In other news, my nephew has just heard from Greenwich Observatory that he’s got a job with them, starting in a month or so.

I know him- massive racist too. Hates gingers.

I’ve said before, their “owner” Louis-Dreyfus, is rich because his family company have held back grain supplies from countries that are desperate for it, in order to artificially raise the price of that grain. He might not be cutting their heads off, but his wealth is built by causing more death than our erstwhile owners.

Only joking man,you cuddie been a bit nicer!

(M)ule never stop me.

Tbf to the bloke, he-haw, he-haw, he’s always had that.

Same bloke refused to accept he was gay. He was in Daniel.

Dyslexic mate of mine has acknowledged his alcoholism and joined the RAC.

FYFYFYP

Try the Mean Eyed Cat- just around the corner from the Percy on St. Thomas’ St. Its got a beer garden out back https://www.meaneyedcat.co.uk/

FYP

Can you not just sit in the beer garden out the back with him, send your chauffeur in to get the drinks?

I’m not ashamed to say that I have.

Boooo!

She will be when she wakes up tomorrow, in her Tena Ladys and “I ❤️Boris” nightie, on the kitchen floor, reeking of gin and piss.

I wish I was that poor

Imagine if NHS workers got together every Friday during the lockdown for well-deserved piss-up. You’d have to assume Johnson would be fine with it.

This is the bit everyone finds hardest to believe.

Full of fine, upstanding members?

Guaranteed this is one conspiracy that middle-aged Tarzan* of theirs won’t swallow. *this divot

Fishing without a license.