Monkeys Fist

I really hope @McFaul has notifications switched on now that he’s back.

Fucking hell! Ask him to sing “ In The Ghetto” for shits and giggles.

MLFd YP

How many times has Bernie Slavin made a pass at Mrs. Gemmill?

Btw KCG, I absolutely didn’t check your avatar before using that pic above.

We could not turn up and still do a better job, tbf

@RobinRobin, we’ve been through this before mate- when you say you’re out with the hobbits to “destroy some pussy”, This is not what we mean. ( Totally SFW ).

Cyclist rides within 1 mile of KCG’s clan broch.

Must be tricky riding a bike in Scotland what with the tartan skirts and free hanging dumbartons. No wonder everyone’s furious.

I should also probably say that I made use of my staff discount and their “ Buy 6 save 25%” offer on wine to celebrate victory for the proletariat this evening. Top Marx!

That would be remiss of me to say, so I can neither CONFIRM nor deny your question. I might break one of their badly written and self- contradictory rules.

Courses are going cheap in Florida just now.

Reported.

If someone asked me to do that I’d laugh my cock off.

I had to write and amend RAMS for my work on the ropes, so know toilet paper when I see it. That wasn’t even the best fuck up. Opening paragraph states that at no point can the vehicle be moved until the check is completed. When we start our shift, the vans are backed up to the loading bay. To complete a full check, you need to drop the rear step, inspect the rear plate, and test the rear door locks.… … which can only be done by moving the van off the bay.

I’m actively looking elsewhere

They worded it as “fraudulently completing a legal document”. It’s because it’s a legal requirement to check your screenwash before your shift. She made a big show of this, frequently referring to “breaking the law” and “legally required” in her opening statements. Mate asked which laws it broke, “for reference, naturally” She didn’t know, wouldn’t admit to that, so adjourned after like 5 minutes Didn’t get any better for her. Utter clownshoes.

It was to do with checking the screenwash levels in my daily check. They said I had to pop the bonnet to do it. Their MS only mentions screenwash once, and then it’s to say that the vehicle will inform you when it’s low with a warning light on the dash. They said they had it on camera that I hadn’t popped the bonnet. We repeated that it wasn’t necessary and mate also said that CCTV can only be used if their is/was a security threat to store or employees, as stated in their company policy. There wasn’t, so no evidence. The vehicle check MS also breaks its own instructions multiple times. Because of that, he questioned their right to apply it in disciplinary proceedings, as following it would make you break their own rules. This took over three hours with numerous adjournments whilst they checked their facts, and clearly realised they were stuffed. Glorious stuff to see.

The translation for the German word for nipple is “Chest Warts”.

In other news, I was almost sacked today, but a former union rep colleague helped me destroy the case of the company based on their own procedure documentation that I was accused of not following, and them not following their own disciplinary guidelines. It was fucking magnificent seeing him in action tbh, listening to their statement, baiting his hook, letting them have a nibble, putting better bait on.… nibble nibble, then dropping a fucking bomb in the water. I won’t be staying long, I think.

Rule 170 and Rule H2 of the Highway Code https://www.highwaycodeuk.co.uk/road-junctions.html