Monkeys Fist

Set the standard pretty consistently for years for talk shows- his interviews with Billy Connolly and Ali were stand-outs, and Meg Ryan for the opposite reasons They’ve started a GoFundMe to build a statue in his hometown. Raised £2:50 so far, which is fantastic for t’Yorkshire.

The state of those pens- where’s the order and tidiness?

Ponce Rugby, I believe it’s called.

Might?

I’d have thought he’d call it Wapumzel.

“ The latest figures show mental health amongst men aged 18-70 on wearside has deteriorated at an alarming rate . “Get on the blower to Comrade Bin Salaman, a couple of friendlies should finish them off.” “ What’s his WhatsApp again?”

The bloke has obviously succumbed to wheymentia after years of inhaling pocket cheese fewms. Same thing took our sweet prince, essembee.

Tommy Wright!

Fwow down your hairng!

You missed a few ‘a’s so I fixed it

Pumpkins are very orange- you’re safe.

What’s to work out like?

I beg your pardon?

Not the song we want to adopt like

“ Cos'è questa "Colazione per Tutto il Giorno di Spoons, Sandro"? "Aiuta con il secondo album* amore mio" * see above

Offset by her tatty bush.

Whilst we’re at it, I wonder if Mrs Tonali has finished her “second album”?

I mean, we all know how, don’t we?

I think you’ll find the two runners-up mentioned above were playing low tier teams and only managed 5 goals… between them.

Mackem monorail. Imagine…

Yes*, yes*, yes*, and yes*. *no *no *no *lift my arse off the seat

“The Express was not prepared to comment on Shepherd's imprisonment.”

Fucking sitters man.

They missed the ‘g’ off his name, didn’t they?