Monkeys Fist

Young Ms. Fist has just finished ( and nailed) her GCSE’s, so we gave her the choice of what she wanted for tea tonight. She chose Chinese takeaway.… Having ploughed through it as best as we could, we’re all sitting here feeling sour and ashamed During lockdown I basically nailed “fakeaways”, so the bar for actual takeaways is pretty much out of reach… She even said “ Dad, thanks, but yours is way better”.

I managed to hold it together until this line.

It’s fucking bizarre reading the replies there, full of absolute touchers referring to Schofield and Willoughby as if they’re their best mates. Fucking sad cases. ( not to excuse Schofield if he’s done the noncery he’s being accused of here, but they’ve got no fucking idea have they? ).

Aye, but.

There are questions being asked ( rightly), about how a EUFA final is being held in a 19,370 capacity stadium. Apparently each side is only getting 4890 tickets. I predict a spicy night in Prague.

Btw, Noseybonked.

Is this place you’re getting wankered in Wonder Bar, in the Gate? If so, you’re definitely on a list.

Not the first time they’ve got excited over young kids …

Not a great day for Teutonic teams/managers.

Lorenzo’s Oil. Been begging the Mrs. to watch it with him for months. The kid dies.

Do you think Anakin was groomed by Padme?

All out war declared. Call the UN.

Final written warning.

Aye, even with 20 minutes added time, no way are they doing it.

Found @The Fish’s alt account. Pugilism Dave.

Gemmill firing the first salvo in the Great Nerd War of 2023.

Scabs beating Bottlers 1-0 at the moment.

Eddie casually strolling in to Stamford Bridge having secured the CL place, giving Frank a pre-match lacing with a cue ball in a sock.

It’s fucking Leicester. Bang Murphy on and he’ll have two wonder goals and have shithoused them to death within the first 20 minutes. Then give Malloy a half and see if he can do owt when we’re 8-0 up. Get. With. The. Fucken. Programme.

Vardy will be getting split in half by his Missus tonight to prepare him for Monday.

I wouldn’t be surprised if it goes to pelanties.

Unreal isn’t it?