Monkeys Fist

Aye I saw the trailer. Weeping at the fact that no one has any reason to talk to him anymore basically. He was on GMTV just now too, making an absolute bellend of himself, telling the same story that he's told on every interview since Jackson died: "He was sitting on the sofa, and I said to him 'Michael.......Michael are you a lonely man?'. And he looked at me.....just stared at me for about 10 seconds, and then he said to me 'Uri Geller....I am a very lonely man.'" Sounds like the banter between the two of them was fucking belting. Glad I didn't see this. I would've been forced to gouge my eyes out( probably with a spoon!).

Did you actually see any games last season? Men of straw

Of those three, 2 were cleaners and one was Lee Ryder after another scoop.

If anyone does come up with the £100 million, a condition of sale should be that the Fat Twat has to spend a Saturday night in Blu Bambu..... On his own.

The self same men of straw who will fire us straight back up? "Nee Bother"

Duff and Jonas. aye nice one cheered me right up keep em coming Managers next please

The spoon bender is spilling his guts on ITV on Sunday. Didn't take long to cash in there mind Uri.

Given the midfield you list above, where are these balls for Carroll coming from? Harper? And who is going to orchestrate this magnificent turnaround? Shearer? No JFK? Ha ha ha Hughton and Calderwood? ffs

£50million taking the piss? He should bite their fuckin hands off. Another season like the last and the Fat Chav will be lucky to get 50p. He's had his fuckin pants down for the past 9 months, shitting on us from a great height. Stubborn and tough? So's constipation. He should take what's offered and gtf. He'll score for his precious £100 million when his personal loan is paid back anyway.

A nightmare? Aren't you the optimist who thinks we'll stroll back to the PL come what may?

Happy Birthday young 'un !

How did the comet affect the weather up there on Jupiter mate?

oooo must have missed that one, i stand corrected Hardly Parky's one-a-week claim mind you.... MF - I work for the lot who built it - it isn't too hard to find that info out. Stick Gherkin Main Contractor into Google and hey presto. Or you could have typed S-K-A-N-K-Y and saved me bothering my arse

Fiddy

He works for the one that doesn't know if the windows are falling out or not.

Mate of mine does the windows on the top section of the Gherkin Craig. Which company do you work for?

Vidals, looks stunning, but purely on practicallity- Foster gets my vote. Have to agree with Jimbo mind, does look like Bertie bassett vomit.

Dear God, HURRY THE FUCK UP! love M.Fist

Tis the same livestock(on the right) n'est pas?

It's only taken me 24 years to learn that "mixing it up" is a bad idea. And then sometimes only 5 pints to "unlearn" it.

Chateau du Nain?

I've spent many a pleasant evening in Southern France getting slowly sozzled on Orgnac Rose. Local, lovely and relatively cheap. The reds from the local Caves are surprisingly decent too. As for home made- got mullahed on my mates damson wine many summers ago. Rocket fuel. Wouldn't bother now when there is so much cheap, decent stuff available to buy.

There was a rumour at the backend of last season that it'd be announced around the start of this season. It was mentioned in the pre-season programme against Huddersfield that the new ground was to be part of the NewcastleGateshead 2018 World Cup bid as a training venue (also with the International Stadium). The Gateshead Chairman and vice-Chairman are part of that bid team. So hopefully we may hear something within the next month. Another good reason to vote for our bid!

14 stitches? I've just had an involuntary "Sumo" reflex. Btw, like Robchester, since reading your post, I've also done the self check. If all the lads on here do the same, hats off to Sandman.