Monkeys Fist

Edwin Van der Sar is in intensive care in Croatia following an aneurysm whilst on holiday. Fuck me, let’s hope he’s ok. https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/66138530

Oh aye, I’ve watched it several times, but it’s been a while. Hasn’t lost any of its power.

Gordon could stay here for the entirety of his career, become a free scoring legend, then go on to lead the club as manager to 10 consecutive quadruples, and he still wouldn’t have made up for those patchwork monstrosities he wore.

If you look in the Transfers thread, he’s got his Technicolour Dreampants on.

I love The Kieron as much as the next absolutely 100% heterosexual man, but you’d think he’d have got changed out of his jimmy jams before tapping up the new lads Mrs.

Or a shot on Ms. Tonali.

Remember our last DoF? His first action as the transfer window opened was to fuck off on holiday. Also, when he tried to sign Shane Ferguson from Birmingham City… where he was on loan from us I’m still pinching myself about this whole new era tbh.

Merda il divano esterno!

Sei sicuro che non sia un'anatra?

Aims for the hole- stabs it in her eye.

Aye, but at least our sponsor doesn’t sound like some Porn Olympics.

ASM’s sex tape; Pump Pump Pu… “Sacre Bleu! Oh La La! Je suis blesse! Hon hon hon!”

Considering the majority are owned by right wingers, “will they fuck” is my best guess. Meanwhile , stop those brown people from coming here.

This is putsching the boundaries of taste tbh.

Transcribed for non twitts. “Secondo Federico Chiesa della Juventus, per fare un'autentica carbonara, tutto ciò che serve è pasta, uova, pecorino, e guanciale. Dai quanto sopra a mamma e lascia che faccia le sue cose.”

Is he the scrap merchant on Tatooine, or have I got the wrong trilogy?

If it does turn out that he’s a rapist, he won’t be anywhere near the first for them. But at least he’s not being put up for reselection as a candidate, unlike this piece of work. https://blackislemedia.com/2023/05/22/met-police-seek-extension-to-tory-mp-andrew-rosindells-bail-in-rape-investigation/?amp

Or, you can read it here. https://www.shieldsgazette.com/sport/football/newcastle-united/newcastle-uniteds-extraordinary-approach-to-loans-revealed-by-feyenoord-4209335 TMFADNR- We have a Loans department headed by Shola and Ramage who visit prospective loan clubs in advance to see if they’re up to scratch, then accompany the player at the beginning of the loan period until they’re settled. I’m quite surprised this is seen as a new approach tbh, I’d have thought it would be standard, but it seems not.

Having read The Email, the affairs are pretty standard Tory scum stuff, but shagging a 16yr old who’s too drunk to stand is straight-up rape, isn’t it?

We asked 100 legendary Rock n Roll guitarists, “Would you rather see a pissed off Ms. Phillipson or…” Our survey said Also, Mercer- he’s the kind of bloke who’d ruin Christmas because his kids beat him at Trivial Pursuit.

Prime Renton.

This is the kind of petty revenge I can totally get behind.

Last time I looked, all of Yorkshire was south.

Mrs. F. bought a Steelbox set of Band of Brothers at a fundraiser Bamp sale at her work. Settling in for a few episodes- too notch stuff.