Monkeys Fist

I'll look oot for the brutally handsome, eloquent Adonis (not Nolan). Cheers!

I have just joined the Rent-a-mongs. Leaving SJP, I got collared for a soundbite. Couldn't help myself. They asked what I thought of events- Hughton had been treated shabbily, They asked what I thought of Pardew- Terrible record, certainly not an improvement. They asked if I could see a even a glimmer of success with Pardew- his record was one of failure, not success. I can spell boycott though

How many taxi drivers does it take to change a light bulb? None-"All the way up there at this time of night? You're having a laugh"

Aye, massive shed with a full-size pitch in it. More bullshit from the club then? Sounds like it. Probably want to keep tabs on them in case they start mouthing off to the press. Mobiles confiscated on the way in Called in the strike breakers?

I'm working at SJP this morning. Usually park in the staff area beside the Milburn reception. Got moved on today , the players have all been called in, " because the training pitch is frozen"! Don't we have indoor facilities at Benton?

Hmmm, reaaaally. Tit. No one can argue against you? You do a fine job of it yourself.

Hmmm, reaaaally. Tit.

Any respect the position of Manager at NUFC carried walked out the door on Monday afternoon man. Pardew will get nowt to spend bar what he can raise dismantling the squad.

WTF ?

Keep taking the Taboo. If you can't see that most people are devastated, not because Hughton was "nice" or "dignified", but because it's a catastrophically bad decision for the future of club, then I really do pity you. Pardew will have your backing? Explains all about you- You'll no doubt vote Labour next election when your mate Dave's cuts have crippled the economy and no fucker can afford to use taxis, or you to fill yours with fuel. Please, give me one area you think Pardew will improve us over Hughton. Just one.

And you wonder why people take the piss CT?

I've been offered "posh" free tickets for this. Really not sure if I'm going. At the moment , not. Can't see anything changing that, and I suspect I won't be going again until Ashley fucks off.

Wouldn't surprise me in the least if Pardew made a fucking mint at the bookies off this.

We should all have a royal rumble. Im just off to check the "How much do you weigh and what is your height" thread to eye up my competition. I think Andre "Peaspud" the Giant might tricky to lob over the top rope like. It's the ankle biters like me and Wacky you need to watch man. Chuck Norris trembles in our presence.

Joe Harvey having fags lit for half time Different times.

The fucking image.

Watched Its a wonderful life too many times Newcastle put 5 past Liverpool and everyone gets on with life. Pardew gets some honeymoon cash to spend in January and brings in a few signings that make an immediate impact. Wins continue and we climb the table fighting all the way to the end for that last European spot. Ashleys five year plan is cut short due to a quatar buy out. Pardew turns out to be the next Alex Ferguson and the trophy room is quickly extended to cope with all the silverware. 20 years pass by, success after success. The Sun does a "where are they now" feature and discovers Mike Ashley has ended up sucking cocks for cheap cider. NUST finally by a pub. Jesus man CT. I was taking the piss

Pardew will make 3-4 additions in January, which enhance the squad and guarantee our safety well before seasons end. Our 11th place finish encourages our star players to sign contract extensions , and all is well in the SportsDirect@St.JamesPark stadium. Edit: it appears CT has hacked my account !

Laziest eye. Most interesting head!! WTF?

90 minutes straight of "One Chrissy Hughton" should say all that needs saying.

Never

QFT. Fucking abysmal that you should have to make the point though. If the media are touting any of that bollocks they can fuck off. The Journal says there were serious question marks surrounding Hughton's transfer judgement. The two high profile summer signings were brought to the club by chief scout Graham Carr, not Hughton, and there was a feeling he lacked knowledge and was indecisive in this crucial area. The Times are promoting the same bollocks. Absolutely unbelievable, do these clowns not realise Wenger has over 30 scouts worldwide, do they think fuckin Wenger went to watch Barca U16's for Fabregas? Bit extravagent he was even allowed a scout tbh given that he wasn't allowed a replacement coach. He should have carried out every scouting mission personally. Also love the fact that (as a body of evidence), they'll have arrived at that conclusion with only half the facts. Ie they won't have known which players have been scouted/recommended for him that may have been complete horrors and that he would have rightly rejected. Total fucking pish. I shouldn't let it but it winds me up, because it brain washes the idiotic masses, 80% of people with an interest in football aren't like the likes of me and you, their views mirror the views of the press at large because they are robots, I honestly think 4 in 5 people who claim to like football don't have a clue. Sheeee-raaaah , we want Sheeee-raaaah He was the best defensive striker I've ever seen on telly.

QFT. Fucking abysmal that you should have to make the point though. If the media are touting any of that bollocks they can fuck off. The Journal says there were serious question marks surrounding Hughton’s transfer judgement. The two high profile summer signings were brought to the club by chief scout Graham Carr, not Hughton, and there was a feeling he lacked knowledge and was indecisive in this crucial area. The Times are promoting the same bollocks. Absolutely unbelievable, do these clowns not realise Wenger has over 30 scouts worldwide, do they think fuckin Wenger went to watch Barca U16's for Fabregas? Would have thought Wenger would have been quite keen to watch Barca's U16's.