Monkeys Fist

Next to the Keelmans Hospital on Pandon Bank. Brrrrrrrrrr!

Jeez its cold today! Fingers have gone through the freeze-thaw-intense pain bit, nuts are like lentils. Roll on summer.

Guess who?

With you and Fish here, hope we annihilate them. That or, we play shite, get some outrageous decisions , and spawn it. Either way, send their classless bunch of fuckwit fans home with faces like a slapped arse.

Its Apron, bitch-tits, not pinny.

Aye, I know what you mean I honestly thought he'd pegged it years ago.

Win= Tits Oot for the Lads. Aeris, not CT. Just for clarity.

Plenty of Ferrero Rocher knocking about.

Win= Tits Oot for the Lads.

I've had this a lot over the years as well. Whenever I do anything nice for a girl they think I've done something bad, so I've stopped doing anything nice now and instead just scream at them to get out my fucking way. They are unfathomable creatures.

Doesn't he have to be Norwegian or something? Is this the one that's in Kazahkstan or somewhere ?

Who is taking part in this week's Norwegian Eurovision final, fact fans! What what what? What's he singing , like?

It's Johnny Cash man! Yeah, what an idiot. Aye, sos like Idioteque, I was a bit previous there Johnny's version is better though Kings of Leon "All the commotion The kiddie-like play Has people talking Talking You Your sex is on fire" Really Boys??

It's Johnny Cash man!

" An Albino A Mulatto A Mosquito My Libido Yeah. " Aye, you can fuck off too, Kurt. The whole song has utterly woeful lyrics, but it's a belter all the same

Much as I love Led Zep, they are responsible for some stinking lyrics like "With a purple umbrella and a fifty cent hat, Livin', lovin', she's just a woman. Missus cool rides out in her aged Cadillac. Livin', lovin', she's just a woman. *Come on, babe on the round about, Ride on the merry-go-round, We all know what your name is, So you better lay your money down. Alimony, alimony payin' your bills, Livin', lovin', she's just a woman. When your conscience hits, you knock it back with pills. Livin', lovin', she's just a woman." Have a word Percy!

"I got a job working construction for the Johnstown Company But lately there ain't been much work on account of the economy" Fuck off Bruce.

"Have a piece of toast"?

What a crazy-mercury swilling-mad as a hatter-gone with the fairies-imbalanced-delusional-nutcase !! I actually think that it's an absolute necessity to him that he maintains his stance of being imperviously correct, and that if he ever entertains the notion that their are other views in this world outside of his that hold credence he will literally have a full on meltdown and go on a blazing rampage that ends in death for a lot of innocents! Can't we all just agree with him and then laugh at him behind his back?....... it may be for the best Dude! You're entering a world of pain. A world of pain!

A little while after the match commentary, Africa by Toto came on. I'd forgotten how utterly terrible the lyrics were… "The wild dogs cry out in the night As they grow restless, longing for some solitary company I know that I must do what's right As sure as Kilimanjaro rises like Olympus above the Serengeti" … this is why session musicians should never be allowed to form bands. So, any examples you feel worthy of the "Shite" tag, post them up.

They get one polite "No Thanks" from me, if they persist it's rapidly followed by a firm " Fuck off", with accompanying stare Works a treat I must say.

Fuck me! Bin Dippers will be seething, another record of theirs lost.

Ei ! Ei ! Ei! I'm off to get laid.