Monkeys Fist

Is Turki Alalshikh best served with rice, or sprouts, roasties and gravy?

Fucking what??? Screwfix- “ Here’s some special shit-proof screws to fix your pink seats, but the deal is you can only use these particular screws… … even if we stop making them” Mackems- “ Sooo, if you stop making them, we can’t put anymore seats in, or replace the ones we have?” Screwfix- “ Correct” Mackems- “ Where do we sign?” Not even they would be that ridiculous, would they?

Harsh. They’re under a lot of denpressure to solve the case.

Shut up.

Fyp

Interesting night- spent an hour trying to get away from “The Whinger- everywhere has one “, only to find eventually that the poor bugger is getting seriously abused from his lass ( stabbed last week, battered with a metal pole the week before). Poor fucker wants out but doesn’t know where to start, and, classically, said ” If I leave her, she’ll do herself in” Mrs. F. is giving me a list of places and people he can talk to, but I’m not holding my breath. On a lighter note, turns out that a lass that works in the office, and is partner to a lad( another driver) I get in with very well at work, grew up with an old climbing partner of mine. Small world moment, which has lead to an invite to mine for dinner , drinks and dildos* Happy days * one is not on really on the menu.… yet.

I’d say either are good- how old are you? If you were around for the older one, get that. If not, get t’other. Appen.

Isn’t he a …

I got the distinct impression that daft lad was just a happy accident- the Bacons were out in force , maybe a tip-off, maybe just caution?

That’s Gemmill man.

Maybe related, what with it being World Jihad Day, but as I drove past Armstrong Vickers on Scotswood Rd. about an hour ago, there was a huge police presence- probably 20-30 coppers at both gates and all along the fence. And one, single daftie dancing about with a Palestine flag.

My old man and Grandad called them mackems- Grandad shuffled in 1976. Washington Mags the pair of them.

Still not dead.

Out tonight for work pints, so.

Wahey!

Rudolph Isley 84. Funky Bastard.

Before you became Comedy Dave then?

Come on! What low effort bullshit names are these? Mr. Chiltern should’ve been Black Belt, as he was the third Dan.

Stay out of the Politics one too mate- nowt but shite about Yakky Tory’s.

Settle down there Miss Congeeniality! For all that you say you hate puns, you can’t help peking at them, can you?

Pho real!

But they leave me wonton more.

Puns make miso happy.