Monkeys Fist

Have done, he's on the case, looking at possibly taking it to The Hague for Crimes against Hugemanatee.

Wasn't Mr. T. strongly opposed to jibber jabber?

I've just been invited by my cousin's bloke to the North Tyneside CID Summer BBQ on June 10th. 21 days from now.

It's a piss take, btw. I think the lad who set it up set up a FB event as a pisstake, and all the chavs , who have a propensity for ostentatious grief, took it seriously.

First shock of the day

Good job he's a Mackem, cos he ain't gettin' on no plane.

I'm not sure you've taken the correct approach here, but I'm sure you'll be shown some suggested improvements. By someone. Shortly.

Crassus tita, quasi iratus rhinos.

Where to start I'll start with the "go faster" blue stripes on the front. Fuck Right Off.

Fixed. Stinks of chips ......

I do NOT wear or own a sovereign ring.

With you driving, change that from depressing to suicide-inducing. (Did you keep the meter running when you stopped for bait top-ups).

Just seen this racist bilge. Given my well known Romany heritage, I'll take this as evidence of your overarching cuntery. A grovelling apology will go some way to calming my ire

That has to be the most depressing journey imaginable.

Furious because the council insisted he had an HGV license.

Oof!

CT drives a maxicab, through necessity.

Just noticed this Cattle prod/taser?

And we're stuck with this for the next 5 years. https://mobile.twitter.com/David_Cameron/status/600252888624078848 5 FUCKING YEARS!

when life gives you Lemons, Party!