Monkeys Fist

Violet Winspear. Never married, no kids. Said she imagined her male leads had to be “capable of rape”.

What is “parents evening”?

Bow down to the true Queen, bitchez

The plan is to put decoy missile silos on uk farmland which exceeds the inheritance tax values. Once Mad Vlad slings a few janky owld bits of 1990s Russian missiles at them, they’ll drop in value and won’t be eligible for IT Sorted. ( We can start by putting a full fake tactical warfare HQ and missile factory on Clarksons gaff.

I’d happily throw my man-eggs her way

We need more radge bastards in politics RIP

No- fit as a fiddle and not a pick of excess fat on him right to the end. He wasn’t scarfing these abominations down twice a day mind, once a fortnight/month ish.

My Dad would occasionally give himself a treat - Sticky Milk Sandwich. No, it’s not jizz on toast, it’s a big fuck-off doorstep of white bread, with condensed milk spread over it , and then, just to guarantee the heart attack, about half a ton of white sugar sprinkled over the lot. Straight out of the Ration Book. He’d offer me one every time he made it, but I never took him up on it.

Tbf, Demi’s actual nips aren’t really her nips any more.

Didn’t take much convincing last time mind

Isn’t he doing away with the Dept of Education?

Because the queue for C&C was massive, whereas there was nobody at the other Collect point that I went to, after my tactical raid in to the store itself. Also, picking up a couple of bags of meatballs to feed the Fistlets addiction. Edit; for clarity- at the Gateshead store there is the C&C which has its collection point just inside the exit, after the tills, and another, separate collection point for instore and online orders. It’s past the entrance on the way out. It’s never as busy as the C&C which is always chokka with identikit couples buying soft furnishings and shit pictures for their identikit new build on an identikit estate, to load in to their Audi suv.

Going off the white walls on the houses, with grey roofs, it’s No. 12, Rohan Drive. The Citadel Minas Tirith.

That’s a lovely bit of fencing, there. How much did that cost you?

Fowl.

Not disputing that figure, but I’ll never forget the day before the actual vote, I was doing a little bridge job right at the top of Wensleydale. Driving up the valley from the east it was just a shitstorm of LEAVE posters and banners on every property or set of gates* and I was utterly baffled as they were literally turkeys voting for Christmas. *there was one fantastic exception who’d gone full “fuck you” with an EU flag flying, and about 10 Remain banners.

Shite. Used two of available three shortcuts - entrance, 1st shortcut to said door dept, short hop to next shortcut to Market Hall (bait cabins), thru fire exit next to the lifts, past the tills, out to the car and up to the Collection Point. Actual time in the shop was 15-20 minutes max, including time spent fucking on looking for staff to check stock/order/pay. Add on time getting a response at the collection point, and loading, 35 minutes is top bombing. Don’t be bringing your swinging bollocks to a Fist fight

Mrs. Fist this morning, ” We need a new door for the bathroom cabinet, from IKEA” *shudders. From parking at the Hell Shop, in, ordered, out, collected. 35 minutes* * only possible as I engineered a solo trip.

Aye, it’s had its time, and that time is past tbh. So, in a break from tradition, I’m going for 5-0 to us. Three og from Di Canio, two full field punts from Pav, and a brace from Bracewell