OTF

Nervous as...

The US fuck-owns the UK in that list TBH. The Encyclopaedia Britannica has been published by the US for the last 100+ years, so it may be a little biased. The boomerang was evidently the first great invention, more than 15,000 years ago Go Australia. Anyway, chicks in lingerie.. woo

Yep, West Ham wouldn't have been here Sheffield would have been below us, and we'd be safe. Fucking Carlos Tevez.

They were all off-side clearly if it wasn't for Nicky Butt (not that the linesman would have called it anyway).

The hair was there last week and a did a decent enough job. Nought spectacular, but decent enough. At least Torres isn't there to embarrass him this time.

My honest prediction for the match is that we'll scrape by by the skin of our teeth for somewhere between 30 and 55 minutes, then Bassong or Coloccini will give away a penalty (which they'll score). Then the glass heart of our players will shatter and Liverpool players will be queueing up in attack with the match ending somewhere on or between 2-0 and 6-0.

Harper Beye, Colo, Bassong, Duff Jonas, Barton, Guthrie, Lovenkrands Martins, Viduka Subs: Krul, R. Taylor (S Taylor if fit), Smith, Carroll, Geremi, Gonzalez, Owen

Steve Taylor will probably be a handy player in the Championship. In addition he's one of the only backs we've got who can pop up and score a couple of goals a season (which is a hard task given the rubbish level of our set pieces). With that in mind if we go down I'd like to keep: Harper Beye S Taylor Enrique Bassong Jonas Guthrie Barton Carroll Lovenkrands Piss off: Nicky Butt Kevin Nolan All Hair No Heart Coloccini Ryan Taylor Shola Ameobi Damien Duff (though he at least seems to be trying now) Michael Owen Mark Viduka Obafemi Martins Alan Smith Geremi Of those, bugger all of them are actually saleable players, particularly given the wages many of them are on (not to mention their ages). With the purse strings pulled tight in the current financial climate it will be a hard task to peddle off the shit that helped to send us down. Many of them could be replaced by some of the young players we have coming through. Give them a chance, and invest a bit of the cash from sales (ridiculous to expect ashley to suddenly invest anythig more in the team) into an up and coming youngster (midfield) from another Championship level club.

QFT.

Only Owen's and perhaps Martins chances were clearcut (Carroll had a decentish chance off a header). Resolute defending from POrtsmouth. Most disappointing part of thqat match for me was the last 15 minutes. Looked more like they were the ones playing for their survival, and they looked the more likely to score. I think that has about done it.

Can't win a game if you can't score a goal. Disappointing effort from Owen.

Guthrie on for Enrique, Duff back to fullback. Guthrie's set pieces have been pretty good thus far (touch wood).

Given the further info we have on injuries I'd like to see this team: Harper Beye Edgar Bassong Enrique Jonas Guthrie Duff Owen Viduka Martins If Coloccini is available I'd possibly have him over Edgar. Duff could be interchanged with Lovenkrands. Duff impressed me with his effort in the Spurs match, even though most of the match he was forced to play in defense which he is not good at. However, I think we may see this team take the field. Harper R. Taylor Beye Bassong Enrique Jonas Butt Nolan Duff Owen Viduka Getting mighty nervous. Tomorrow is either going to be a day of hope or a day of depression and helpless realisation. In the meantime I'll try to enjoy the ride.

He does actually dive to the ground and over-act like most strikers...

...and hopefully the field, the goals and the nets will remind them they are football players.

And another!

Yep. The worst part is he's exactly the sort of player we need. There had been plenty of talk before he lit up Euro as well, which it seems is the only time that Arsenal's interest grew.

Fabregas's goal to be honest (not just cause he scored it). Was a team goal overall, but Fabregas slid the ball into the path of Arshavin (after a neat heel pass from Bendtner). Arshavin's ball back to Fabregas was a little heavy but Fabregas still managed to slam it past Brad Jones who also had Bendtner running across his line of vision.

True, I probably was being a little harsh. Though I was personally disgusted with his efforts or lack thereof in the last match.

Butt is shite and does nothing except slow down the movement of the ball infinitely, make shit passes, and make even worse tackles. Even worse than that he can't be arsed to run and defend as evidenced last week. He's a disgarce and I hope I never see him play again. That said I'm sure he'll yet again be in the starting 11 again for Monday's match.

Looks crap on Owen and Nolan, looks great on Jonas. I love the front (except for the adidas stripes on the shoulders) the back however looks odd without the numbers, but should look decent with a name and number on there.

Barton coming back is good, but you have to question what his fitness will be.

He was way too casual tracking back. Just let Bent jog passed him to tap in the goal. He might have been running flat out, difficult to say Sad but true.

I really hope that Shearer had something to say to Nicky Butt as a result of their first goal.

Viduka blowing out of his arse is better than Shola who is just plain arse, and dare I say Carroll who at this stage of the season should work well as an impact player. If it was my choice I would run with this: Harper Beye Bassong Taylor Enrique Jonas Guthrie Duff Owen Viduka Martins Subs: Forster, Smith, Carroll, Edgar, R. Taylor, Geremi, Nolan