OTF

We're hilariously bad.

Feels like we've not strung more than two passes together all game. Fucking ill informed commentators going on about how most of the pressure is on Pardew because he's not from the North East and the rest is because of unrealistic expectations. Bell ends.

Fucking hell we're a complete shambles

This gave me an uncontrollable chuckle. Thanks.

Any publicity is good publicity! Headline: Janmaat error costs Dutch. Sub: Sports Direct records record profits

Double drace At half time with Newcastle trailing 0-2 Jonas emerges from the tunnel wearing his Spider-man mask. He has a blinder combining with Cabella to create two goals for Ferreyra (one off each cheek). In injury time he goes on a trademark hazy run (the type that results in slow motion black and white youtube tributes) resulting in Schneiderlin tripping over his own legs. He dinks the ball over the helpless keeper into the back of the net and instead of pulling out his Spider-man mask to celebrate he removes his Jonas mask to reveal it was Ferguson all along. Should have known from the end product! Southampton launch an immediate appeal and get the 3 points while Newcastle are docked 20.

Pure speculation on my behalf, but I'd assume with all the non-english speaking players we have Mike wanted a similarly non-english speaking manager and that's why we've ended up with Pardew.

Can someone go get Roeder from Rotterdam?

Never goes into a challenge. Only way he could injure himself is running away to a corner and tripping on the ball doing a stepover.

Does anybody care anymore? A season in the.championship was more fun tbh.

http://imgur.com/a/S4EdB http://imgur.com/a/plwh9

I'm intrigued to see their price point. For me they're very poor value for money at the current going rate and I can't see them meeting the market price for a high end phone. There's a.few argument that say they need not, mostly sales but also the reliability and consistency of IOS. For me they're severely hamstrung by not having expandable memory and then charging excessively more for the same device with not that much more on-board storage. The minor and decreasing quirks of Android can easily be stomached when coupled with the much better pricing and form factor/screen size options.

Turns out our roster is full already, so we need not speculate about any signings

Dang, I was hoping inbetweeners would be an improvement on the first flick.

They'll never become ready by playing fullback, completely different positions. You've got to persist and if it then doesn't work you move on. We've botched the approach with MBiwa, but he has also done himself no favours. From the little that we've seen I think he's one of those players who looks technically good and confident when he's not under pressure or having to make a split second decision, however the moment that changes it quickly falls to bits. The last player who sticks in the memory like that was David Rozenhall.

At the ground I'm sure you wouldn't have seen it clearly, but he didn't actually go into the tackle and couldn't get out of the way.

It's a sledge Citizen Pain?

Can't help but feel there is a sucker punch or two waiting to be dealt as the window comes to a close.

Night and day compared to last season's opener. My recollection is that that abomination spurred us on to lift our game and get some results shortly after. Hopefully we build on the positives here and win some very winnable fixtures in our next 6.

With two central defenders marking him he should not have been able to make anything but a backwards pass. If there was going to be second man on him it should have been a fullback. Easy in retrospect of course. I thought both Coloccini and Williamson individually had pretty good games spare that moment.

As an impact substitute he had no impact.

If you want to nitpick those statistics it looked to me that Perez's shot was on target before it took a deflection.

No, he wasn't. Anyone who thinks he was needs to go back and "look at the game tape" or admit they're talking out of their arse. What I meant was that I'd prefer if we still had Routledge, should not have said wish. Routledge has quick feet and will run at a man. Pointless conversation though.

No he wasn't.

Straw man. No one has ever disputed that.