OTF

Good save Darlow.

Feels like half our players have had a kick at Lamptey.

Perming his hair.

Get out now whilst you can, lucky bugger.

They're going down because we're coming in with physical/late/from behind knocks that are nowhere near the ball. Fucking dire in terms of attitude.

Don't like playing wide? Here, play against this kid who is tearing all our players new arseholes... you'll love it!

Subtle as a sledgehammer Fernandez.

Can someone actually hurt this kid if they're going to foul him?

You're kidding surely? He was in the middle of the field not involved in the play and then put onside by their player and the ball passed back for him to score. The challenge from ASM was idiotic, even though he did glance the ball it was at the same time as he contacted their player.

Terrible challenge from Shelvey there.

2-0 geez. Resumption of normal service?

Geez, they're time wasting already.

ASM needs a goal to move up to 0 for the season.

Cracking thread this. Shite start.

*Kieron Dyer has entered the thread*

'ken oath. Mitch Starc's mum made a few birthday cakes for my kid's birthdays, and she's a champ. That's about my current interest in cricket wrapped up.

Has cricket started back up yet?

Fair enough, couldn't crack it for a run when we were weaker up top, so no chance now (loading impending injury crisis of strikers in 3...2...1...)

Have these QCs not seen that Luke Edwards has called this saga over?

Well this is an unusual feeling.

Niiiice Hendrick

You beauty, deserved goal!

Bit unlucky for Declan Rice to get injured despite not playing in the first half.

Evereything but the finish from Carroll.

Thought that was in for a moment.