OTF

TSFOAN. Too Shit For a Nickname. I'm sure it will catch on. My vote would be TIM - The Invisible Man.

I have a matchworn Jose Enrique.

That he'd want to go somewhere and play constantly where he is celebrated by the fans, players and management instead of rotting away on a bench not developing during key years in a limited career lifespan, yeah, clearly mentally deficient.

Never knew we were amongst such elite level athletes here, well done lads on choosing to use your considerable powers for other more socially advancing endeavours.

Imagine the calibre of team we could put together based on the Ashley era irons in the fire. Probably quite shit still, but my what a pleasure just to ponder on the mystery of it all.

Got to be super easy to wind up Bruce, he got a free ride with the empty stadiums last season.

Saying that the football under Brunce has "on the whole, been bad" is putting a positive spin on things. That said the hole that Bruce has been hardest on is his own after a big beef madras bender.

Nice try Mrs Bruce.

Could this be the week that the club gets the hang of this footballing lark?

Even their virus was substandard.

I give a shit, but my expectations are so low so that there's no way I can be disappointed. Fanx Mike, fanx EPL!

Lejeune on his way as well. Silly IMO letting him go for what will be a lot less than it will take to replace him with similar quality. Should still have a few good seasons left.

ASM on to get lumps kicked.

He wouldn't be signing him for us though, would he. Think his targets at Everton will be somewhat different to here. Still, lazy rubbish story.

Both GKs did well, just too many average or poor penalties.

Just enough. Drama.

Penalties suck.

Shocker

Nice save, crap pen

Good pen HK

Didn’t look a foul at all.

Stunning goal!

Agree that with a tasteful sponsor the home shirt would actually be quite good.

A swing and a miss. That purple monstrosity could have been OK if it was a more palatable colour. As it stands it's worse than the banana special, best modeled by a portly Stevie Taylor. That strip became likeable because we had a memorable winning season in the Championship, there's no chance of that in the premier league. The home strip is right out of Pro Evolution soccer.

Shaping to be a really intriguing match, hope it's a spectacle that the best team wins, no penalties (during the game or to decide it). Will probably even get up to watch it, 5AM on a freezing cold Monday winter morning in the middle of a lockdown.