Howay

He doesn't call himself the best coach in the league for nowt you know.

Krul is out of his fucking mind btw.

Class from Perez. Would you look at that? the one time we keep it on the deck on a set piece we fucking score!

Stunning how shit West Brom are too mind, they get a corner against us, we haven't won a single header against any defensive set piece all day and they pass it along the deck.

Not sure what any of us are going to do mind, as Carver says this is all we have in our lives!

Aye that's right lads keep on fucking crossing, it's worked so brilliantly the last 8 games.

Honest it's totally fucking ridiculous, I don't think I've seen a team that's worse at set pieces in my life.

Best Sissoko's looked in fucking yonks this. Have we told him if we go down we wont be letting him leave?

All we're doing is crossing, Carver does know he's playing a fucking Pulis team. We should be going at them with the ball on the deck, especially with Perez, Sissoko and Cabella playing, I fully expect Carver wont adapt his tactic and we'll spend all day trying to force Perez and co into winning headers against 6' 3" bruisers.

Our mute Captain failing again to give Dummett a shout that he had a good run on the cross.

I hope Ashley is fucking hating this by the way, if we're all having to suffer I hope it's even worse for him.

Carver is definitely changing things mind, we were dogshit at set pieces before he took over but we've definitely got worse. I can barely recall winning a header when defending one since he got the job.

Best thing Sissoko's done all year really, hope?

"Time for talking is over" he then goes on to provide two more soundbites. This also coming from a bloke that hasn't shut the fuck up since the last loss and we've basically had a set of quotes every day since. Oh aye prediction, a 0-3 loss to West Brom. Colocinni to get sent off.

They'll have Boro, although I reckon Boro would hammer them. I'll never hear that Martinez is a good manager, I don't care if he goes on to bigger and better things he can go fuck himself. Total dogshit losing to that rabble today. Incredible that the ownership of this club have sat and pulled apart a team that looked like solid top half contenders after the last promotion to such a degree that we thoroughly deserve to go down.

His shit start to the season is a good reason we're in the fucking shite now you mackem knacker.

Was just about to say aye, we'll be below mackems and Boro ffs. People can't go next season in the Championship man, they simply cant.

Aye we're tragic and it's our own fault but it's still frustrating to see a team below us picking up points in such a bullshit way. Defoe should have been off and it would have been 1-1 instead they get down the other end and it goes off a bloke being charged for being a peado and then the hand of the bloke who should have been off and goes in.

What the fuck is with the mackems? I've never seen a team get as much luck 2 pens last game, a deflected goal today, didn't give away a pen and have defoe sent off then they get a fucking double deflection in off Defoe. We're fucked.

Pretty sure Jenas leveled the "they've nowt else to talk about" bit when he wanted to leave, which makes the fact Carver is trying it as a compliment even better. The fact he said 'Nipples like Ice cubes' in an interview from one supposed professional to another is also great. Unbelievable that it has taken this much of a fucking disaster for us to come below Sunderland and possibly get relegated again but Ashley has well and truly fucking managed it.

Aye, flukey as fuck which is their style. Thanks Carver and co for making me feel like I have to watch this shite.

Mackems go 1 up, we're fucked.

Fucking hell man, how can they have the gall to push all these 'get behind the lads' messages then the next day have the bloke come out and go "oh aye I'd be long gone if I was in charge of anyone else" like it's some fucking source of pride! Fuck 'the lads' they gave up long ago and fuck the ownership and leadership of the club as they've intentionally done the minimum required since our promotion and it's close to catching them out again like it was last year and the year before. I honestly just wish Carver would shut his fucking trap and just get on with losing every week, he's the one attracting attention to himself now with his utter insane rants. How can a bloke come out and say he believes he's the best in the league and then say that he would be sacked if he was anywhere else? Incredible

I'd have it set up the same as you but Riviere instead of Armstrong. I know Riviere is struggling for goals but he has shown some (brief) flashes of being a Premiership player whereas I think Armstrong wont make the grade, he doesn't have the pace or skill to make up for his lack of physicality tbh. Utter shite side whatever way you cut it, what a total fucking disaster. In fact there would be some mild temptation to put Gouffran up top as he did manage to score in the past when he played there, that looks like it's gone now but what else is there I suppose? Just put ol' one leg out on his crutches if necessary.