Howay

It seems he did his brand of commentary over today’s “heartbreaker”, I’ve not watched but I’m sure it’s brilliant.

But their owner went to a U-23 game which meant he’s amazing, “gets it” and they have their club back.

What a fucking stinking game this is . Nice to make sure the fans in attendance get the full Steve Bruce masterclass.

It would be bad enough if it was just shite off the top of his head, but the saddest part is he’s clearly wrote down this shambolic little ode to Wyke and even had a long think about the instrumental that it will (dubiously) go with. Of course being a mackem he’s elected to go with what sounds like New Monkey, which as we all know is the music to all major mackem social events.

Aye, like he recorded that and then watched it back and though yup I want to put that onto Twitter for everyone to see. What a nobber, “fight for the future of the mackems” they are utterly tragic.

Almost makes me wish Chelsea had won.

I always find when they play shocked that Rafa “got more respect/leeway from supporters” one of the weirdest angles the likes of Edwards work in their Bruce v Rafa obsession. Benitez earned that level of respect, Bruce has accomplished comparatively nothing as a football manager.

They love a pointless debate that has no way of factually dispelling it in the moment (see Classy debate). The fact is they’re a million miles away from having an ASM calibre player at their club, it’s also just a weird debate -they think Sessegnon was a good player so even if he was better than ASM (he’s absolutely not btw) does that mean ASM isn’t a good player? The fact is this is coming from a fan base that had many discussions where they argued that Colback and Cattermole were a better midfield duo than Cabaye and Tiote, they’re completely incapable of making any rational judgement on our players. We could have Lionel Messi playing for us and they’d tie themselves in knots to come up with some weird argument that he’s shit. Sessegnon played for them between the ages of 27-29, they’re trying to compare him to a bloke who came to the league at 22/23 and is still only 24 . If they want to compare the players at similar ages then Sessegnon managed 6 goals in 61 games for Le Mans at a similar age range to ASM getting 6 in 49 in the PL for us, as the goal metric seems to be the one they’ve focused on. So objectively at a similar age ASM has a better strike rate in a harder league away from the comforts of home. They’re also comparing goals in seasons where Sessegnon has played 15 games more than ASM, if you take the three seasons where they played similar amount of games Sessegnon managed 5, 1, and 2 goals in 26, 28, and 25 game seasons respectively. ASM has had 3 goals in each of his 26, and 23 game seasons, also worth noting is that the seasons we are comparing here are also Sessegnon 5+ PL seasons into his career where he is between 28/29 and 32/33, so a very experienced senior pro in what really would be his prime compared to a young forward in his first two seasons in a foreign league. That’s purely using their goal argument, from what I’ve seen of Sessegnon as a player he was simply never on ASM’s level, and if ASM continues with this improvement and consistency then he will play for a top side soon, whereas Sunderland and West Brom were basically the pinnacle of Sessegnons career. Again, it’s a pointless debate and one where you can’t argue as they simply harp on about the two seasons Sessegnon outscored ASM. I mean I suppose that’s the issue when the best players to play for your club are of the calibre of Kevin Phillips we’ve had maybe 15+ strikers alone better than that journeyman.

Brilliant.

A classic but this sums the boring little wanker up.

Aye, it wasn’t even remotely close. It didn’t even look close in real time on the first look, Ake was always clearly ahead of him ffs.

They’ll make Alex Bruce cry mind.

Why can’t he put that type of power behind his shots from open play?

Cracking pen tbf and good play to win the pen.

What we deserve that. Another game where we aren’t even going to bother trying to have any of the ball.

I’m at the point where it is actually starting to bother me . They genuinely can’t be watching our games, and looking at our results and genuinely think he’s doing a good job right? I almost just need them to admit he’s doing poorly but they’re all his mates. We went on a run of like 23 games without a win or something outrageous for fuck sake and these nob heads act like he’s hard done by. The fucker shouldn’t be in a job!

That would make more sense tbh.

They really don’t understand that the way they’re so abrasive and seek to shove it in people’s faces when things goes well has an impact on people’s attitude towards them when things are going bad. They’re taking the piss giving him that btw, no team did better than 2 wins and 2 draws? We didn’t even move a spot in the table in April did we? The guys still a fucking shite manager so I’m not sure why his thick son is acting like it’s some proof he’s good, also I’d been giving him the excuse he’s a lazy prick if he’s actually putting in long hours like his son says (he’s definitely not btw) that’s even more embarrassing when looking at the shambolic way the team play. As always I really can’t wait until this wanker is nothing to do with our club. “I know how much this job means to you” they realize simply repeating something doesn’t make it true.

Exactly. Imagine the coverage if Ole said similar things about Manchester United fans after a good win, you’d have the whole ex-yooooonoited pack of cunts on for a sky special to discuss how best to punish Ole. Say it about Newcastle fans and not only do they side with him, but it’s to the point where they don’t even see why any Newcastle fan could take issue with anything he said. Again I really wish this super league had happened.

Yup, and sure enough now Simon Jordan is laying into Newcastle fans off the back of the reaction to Bruce being a bellend. Not that anyone gives a flying fuck about Simon Jordan’s opinions on things, the blokes an arrogant waste of space it’s no shock he sides with Bruce.

I mean there’s no other way to take what he meant. Unless for some reason he meant Ashley’s expectations, in which case that would be staggering seeing as his expectations are 17th with not a single fuck given to the quality of football played. Just please fuck off Bruce. It does a lot to be as unliked as Allardyce and Pardew, but this bloke is managing that with ease.

What a gimp he is man, as I’ve said I hope everyone in the NE just stops bothering with his articles as he clearly has such disdain for the area. What other reason would he have to bring Parker up, other than to defend a bloke that’s been a below average manager for 20 year? I know he likes to pretend his scope is greater than NE football but tbh it’s not. It might sound harsh wanting the bloke to lose his job, but tbh the NE football community deserves better than this fucking loser. He’s clearly hit his ceiling as a journalist and is pissy about it, the bloke hasn’t broken a notable story in who knows how long despite two years of sucking Bruce off, so has now taken to simply trolling the fan base he’s supposed to be engaging positively with and building trust with. I honestly have more respect for Lee Ryder at this point and he’s a journalist that can’t spell check his own articles for fuck sake. Edwards now basically just posts a shite article coupled with a trolling tweet, then when people point out something from the tweet, headline, or synopsis he just retorts with some rehashed bullshit telling them to read the article in a snobby, arrogant tone. He’s an arrogant prick for someone that is clearly shit at his job. It would be far better having someone that’s excited at the opportunity to cover NE football, and actually work to produce interesting articles/genuine information, he conveniently forgets he acted like the Henry Mauriss bid was more credible than the Saudi one... His knowledge of football is also very poor for a bloke whose job is to literally talk about football. He’s acting like it’s insane for people to say they’d take Parker over Bruce, yet Parker got Fulham promoted which is something Bruce hasn’t done in fucking yonks (including when he had the most expensively assembled squad in Championship history), Parker is also working with a newly promoted side not one in their 4th season so Luke should be able to see that’s not a fair comparison, there’s also the fact that Parker doesn’t regularly embarrass himself and the club he represents, nor does he see a decent win as an opportunity to launch attacks on his own clubs fan base. I think Luke is also missing the point that people that are saying they’d take Parker over Bruce aren’t suggesting Parker is some brilliant manager, it’s further indictment of Bruce. If the bloke genuinely can’t see why the fan base has an issue with Steve Bruce then he’s beyond help.

He’s such a fucking wanker. He basically goes on and goes “I’m not sure why they don’t like me, they’ve been shite as long as this owner they inexplicably don’t like has been here, the fact they’re shite with me shouldn’t be a problem for them so I’ll just keep being shite” Cheers Steve, so no clue at all why a fan would hear that and not like you? I hope for his sake he’s just saying it and can understand why privately as if not it’s a miracle the bloke manages to have the cognitive ability to stuff the copious amounts of Mars bars and space raiders in his mouth that he does to keep himself going. Whenever it happens it’ll be fucking brilliant the day we see the back of this utter fucking plug and the monumental cunt that employed him.