Lou

should take his own advice not so much on the speed thing though, you're adequate at that.

I once grandly opened the door to my dad's office, and stood proudly, filling up the doorframe with my mighty presence... ...and by complete and utter chance, he was listening to handel's messiah, and JUST as I did that, the music went...... "HALLELUJAH!!!!!!! HALLELUJAH!!!!!!!!!!!!" It was one of the best moments EVER.

I just realised that the half hour (or whatever) I spent searching for the Perfect Castle, I spent IGNORING all the links to websites that SELL BOUNCY CASTLES. Talking of fucktards!!!!! WHY did it not occur to me STRAIGHT AWAY that I HAVE TEN MILLION POUNDS. I CAN BUY A BOUNCY CASTLE!!!!! I could keep it in the biggest room of my castle. A castle within a castle. Fantastiche!!!

keeps getting caught out by me replying. unless he thinks i'm a fucktard too

is humbly* apologised to for being called made up words. using supposedly made up words is just WRONG. it was extremely lebstronomous of me to do so..... *sarcastically

I've just realised. I have TEN MILLION POUNDS here..... I'm such an idiot. I would also get pit lane passes for all the other races too. But I wouldn't buy them too far in advance, because in the end Jenson'll just invite me along for free, so it's ok. Although if I did buy them and didn't need them, I could give them at random to lowly general admission folk and completely make their day(/year). Oooo..... and accommodation in Edinburgh for the whole of the festival........ This needs more research tomorrow. When I should be doing my accounting project. DAMN YOU, FISH!! Nice thread though. Tiz fun.

should use the word 'fucktard' instead... it has a happy ring to it.

Right. somewhere to live. This place is frickin' AWESOME - it has a portcullis and turrets and towers and all!!!! WOW!! It's in Idaho though. Hmmmm... NOT the most convenient for me.... But only $2.1m (£1.22m) ... so maybe a nice holiday home..... *continues looking*

is a bit of a fucktard most of the time

The Boat always used to be the monday night place for us stoodenty folk, but from what I can tell that's shifting towards tiger tiger. I just go wherever my friends are going and put up with it.....

Talking of shoes on wheels... knock off another $64 (£37)... Always thought they looked quite fun. Hmm... I need myself some form of big ass house with turrets........

£13,520 on.... OK, only £9984080 left...

I'm not that bad

If you didn't do it so often, maybe he wouldn't look atcha like that. Maybe if you said Lou from Newcastle, to narrow it slightly, he'd be less confused. He'd probably still look atcha like that, but he'd be less confused.

My first £2,400 would be spent on a VIP Paddock Pass for the Monaco GP. I'll also need to budget in travel, accommodation, and an inconspicuous outfit suitable for stalking. Next up.... hmmmmm....... *goes off to think*

100% agreed Say hi to Silky for me. Or, alternatively, don't. Both work. Do enjoy though. He's back up here at the Hyena in a week or so, I'll have to try and persuade some friends to come with. It's sucky having to go alone.

Fishie, am I right in thinking you're in Leeds? Silky's got gigs on there again this week methinks. www.killforaseat.com

Ticket Inspector - Eddie Perfect. With audience singalong with the final line of the chorus, which is "and fuck the people right up the arse" Apparently someone once recognised Eddie in the street and yelled that at him.... Needless to say it scared everyone else in the vicinity! However, in my head, I have "wouldn't it be nice if the world was chocolate? no it fuckin' wouldn't because you'd meelllllttt....." which is a pisstake of the Cadbury's TV ads in a certain country in the southern hemisphere that i apparently mention quite a bit....

Whitley Lodge estate. Hang on whilst I shout through to the dragon to see if she knows what it's called. Carolyn Crescent she reliably informs me. D'oh!! She has just poked her head around the door and seen the 'dragon' comment!! 62389[/snapback] Very Basil Fawlty...

:angry: LOVE it!!!! Fantastic. Plus, goats are evil. BOIL THEM ALL!!!!!

I really wanted to see Madagascar, but I never did. I remember seeing a trailer for it at the beginning of the Shrek 2 dvd that was SO DAMN FUNNY I had to rewind it and insist my friend came back from the kitchen so that she could appreciate it. I have no idea what happened that was so funny though. Also, I dislike Shrek. A lot. Although I queued for a couple of hours in sweltering heat to go on the Shrek ride thingy at Universal Studios in LA, and (here's the BIG surprise), it was worth it. Good god I have to do my accounting assignment!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's in for Friday. *shudder*

You realise that it's tragedy PLUS TIME = comedy, right?? I don't think a couple of days really counts as being enough of a PLUS TIME in this equation. Plus, it helps if the joke's actually good to start with (PS - Mags - love it!!)

I just sit in wait to be able to use it, it has to be said.

Check out the Bad Taste Jokes thread........!