The Fish

You are a taxi-queue pest though.

It's nippy.

definitely a hangover.

Sounds similar to Coleman with Wales.

Hi five lil buddy!

There are two explanations for that gag; Hangover, or you've just become a father.

You own a Roomba, you chode sporting knacker.

... it's the Mickey Mouse song from Mickey Mouse Club from the 60's I'd have thought you would have watched that at the time, with your great, great grandchildren. It's also used in Full Metal Jacket.

Will do, cheers. fwiw, I got a good deal with Admiral, both of us are insured fully comp on both cars for £1k between us. I've had no "No claims bonus" as I've been a named driver on various policies rather than accumulating them on a policy of my own. She's lost her no claims because some Chelsea tractor claimed £700 for a paint job after a supermarket fender bender. *shaky fist*

I'd rather be the dart board.

Nah, I just used жиберип өчүрүү

Aye, a mate warned me about that so I started googling This is local; http://www.independent-bmw-servicing.co.uk/ but I got inexplicably angry at the matey "Too broke to visit a garage" and "For a service with a smile (not a grunt)". That was compounded when they say "When people use jargon, they may as well be talking to you in Clingon! Sometimes it'd be nice if somebody would explain things in plain English." "Clingon" ffs

Don't you drive a Mazda MX5?

I couldn't cut it as a salesman, because I'm not enough of a cunt.

Not in those words specifically, but aye I did.

Took an old 5 series estate out for a test drive, but it felt old, brakes were spongy as fuck and the upholstery was tired. When it was clear the sale wasn't looking positive the salesman gave up and acted like a right sullen cunt. So I go to test drive another couple of cars I'd found. Just so happens one of them is at a sister dealership of this place. I get there, am treated well, take the 1 Series out for a test drive and love it, go away "to think about it", get £400 knocked off the price and pick the car up the next day. Job's a good un. Then I get a phonecall from the branch manager who says the first guy is claiming that because he saw me first, I'm his customer and he should get the commission He didn't sell me the car he showed me, he didn't show me the car I bought, and in truth he put me off buying the car he showed me. Salesmen... all cunts, but this one was premium grade arsehole.

Hope they're ambitious with the design and don't build a flatpack Riverside style stadium.

BMW 1 Series. Because I too am a cunt.

Who's the mental Serbian Whose goal rates 1 in 3 M-I-T, R-O-V, I-C Mitrovic Hey! there, Hi! there, Ho! there You're as violent as can be M-I-T, R-O-V, I-C Mitrovic Mitrovic, Mitrovic, Forever let us hold your banner high! High! High!

Never knew that about Cruyff, any idea why he wasn't offered another contract by Ajax? Given he's a Dutch footballer, I'm expecting him to have fallen out with someone...

Called 3 earlier and explained I never use close to my 12Gb allowance for about £29pm. I barely use 3Gb and want to reduce my expenditure, so what can they do for me? "Well sir we can be offering you a very good deal, a brand new iPhone with 15Gb allowance for £30pm." Fucking idiots. I'll be switching asap and Virgin looks a good deal.

Partly the media side of things, but mostly having a smarthome appeals to me. Mostly because I want to be Iron Man.

Yeah we're getting Hive or Nest installed when we get a house in the new year, but I figured it could be a thing that people could buy me now, so they don't end up wasting money on shit I don't want or need. Like a Tool Kit. Or a "funny" book of awful taxidermy.