The Fish

Last time I went it was a 45 minute wait, for a 3 minute procedure. There's no fucking way he's staying still for 3 minutes, let alone 45. Don't get me wrong, one of my sisters would happily drive 2 1/2 hours to look after him. However, she can barely get off the sofa, so there's no chance she could sprint around the park making sure he doesn't run full tilt into the frame of the swings. There's also the very real danger that she'd drive him to MacDonalds "as a treat" then plonk him in front of Peppa fucking Pig while she eats a Family Box. We're usually well-stocked for babysitters, but both sister-in-laws will be busy, local friends are busy too. That weekend just happens to be the one everyone's made plans. Just bad luck.

IT'S NOT ALL ABOUT YOU RAYVIN. GOD!!

Wife is off to London to stay with sister-in-law who should be having a child cut out of her any minute now. Which means I'm looking after the little lad. No one available to babysit.

Pokemon

Been offered the second jab on a day that I can't make it. No idea what I can do about rearranging or postponing or whatever. There only seems to be an option to book, or opt-out?

What's that now?

What're we thinking, a Month? A fortnight before some scrote daubs "Dillens a grass" on Robbie's shorts.

Asked a journo last year about it [quote]Do you know Luke Edwards at all? If you do, is he this antagonistic in real life, or is this just a twitter persona he’s cultivating? Jul 21, 2020, 6:52 PM Bit of both! But he’s a really sound guy and does get info from genuine places. You’d like him in person![/quote] I'm not sure I would like him in person. My sister-in-law's boyfriend, lets call him Mark, is antagonistic, pointlessly controversial, and he's a right cunt. Edwards is either doing this for attention, or it's his actual personality. Either way, him and Mark aren't invited to my 40th.

Tried to buy some DOGECOIN on a whim about a week ago, but HSBC won't let me.

I'd love to see the spreadsheet essembee has made for all of this.

Had no idea, so had to google; Hull Peterborough Blackpool Sunderland Lincoln City Oxford Charlton Portsmouth Ipswich Gillingham Accrington Crewe Milton Keynes Dons Doncaster Fleetwood Burton Shrewsbury Plymouth AFC Wimbledon Wigan Rochdale Northampton Swindon Bristol Rovers Sunderland being the biggest team of that lot isn't something I'd be shouting about, if I was them. Like being a healthy bloke on a leper colony; you won't be for long.

Can't see anything but a comfortable win for the crisp shaggers.

Whereas I'm still on blue nun with an Alka-Seltzer lobbed in.

Champagne up the arse and an overinflated sense of self worth?

Takes me back.

"At present fishing contributes around £1.4 billion to the economy" "The value of the entertainment and media market in the United Kingdom (UK) has been increasing since 2013, reaching over 62.8 billion British pounds in 2017. By 2023, the UK's entertainment and media market worth is projected to reach 80.5 billion British pounds"

Pop across the river to the Bricklayers? They have an excellent doorframe you can smash your head off and look a right tit. 8/10 would recommend

Arbitration succeeds and he gets the sale This succeeds and he gets compo Neither succeeds he can claim he's done everything possible and paint the PL as the bad guys. Small cost, potentially huge rewards, so it makes sense. I miss arguing about Viana's best position.

Yes, you're right of course. Literally everybody not currently within a licensed bar is proving they're too stingy to go inside.

Common spelling mistake there, MF.

Thompers is Quiff, isn't he?

Oh aye, I remember that, but not his homage. KSA's a miss. We're stuck with Thompers.

He did what now? Well, mockery is the sincerest form of flattery, I suppose.

How big is your lawn, like?

The only thing you've rattled is your fleshlight. Cock like a pug's tongue.