The Fish

Joelintron there, a winner, making.... I wanna say Krafth? look a right mug. Legend.

Suckmaplums

Listen, you can get in a tizz if you like, but the truth of the matter is this; I specifically said that his cards were reckless and stupid. You find me a source for those metrics and I'll happily provide a pretty graph for it. Hayden plays as a Defensive Midfielder, Jonjo doesn't. Just because they exist in roughly the same area of the pitch doesn't mean you can compare their roles. Shelvey is evidence of the club being run down by Ashley. He's not good enough for a Premier League team aiming for midtable. The stats you gleefully think prove I'm wrong are proving me right on the central point of this 'discussion'. Hhis game is to be a creative force and yet we're getting more of that from Murphy, Ritchie etc. You can try to pivot away from your claim that "he's outlasted and outperformed" every other midfielder (as if context doesn't exist unless it's recorded numerically), you can get angry and put things in CAPS, but the point the original poster was making is that he's shit and needs to go. That he should have been peddled a long time ago. This isn't a controversial opinion and regardless of how special and impressive you think he is, the facts are that a creative midfielder for a Premier League team who has performed as he has, would have been sold/released by any other club.

It's also worth looking at things aside from transfer fees. Look at the way the boardroom has functioned (lol) in the past 14 years under Ashley. We haven't had a proper board of directors since McClaren left (I think). This means fewer people are doing more of the functions required of a modern football club at a senior level. Our recruitment has been haphazard for over a decade, even when Carr was sourcing good players from the French market, there didn't appear to be a joined up plan. Permitting autonomy for Benitez to overhaul the squad and deliver immediate automatic promotion is great, but don't then restrict his autonomy when we need to spend to build upon that solid foundation. Otherwise you'll be stuck with players like Gayle, Shelvey, on high wages for long contracts. Which means you can't sell them when their stock is high, which means as their impact diminishes their wages become an insurmountable obstacle for teams who may have taken a punt. e.g. We could have sold Gayle to West Brom and taken Rondon, possibly even part exchange. But because the word form on high was a firm NO to older players, we were stuck with Gayle on a permanent deal, and Rondon on a loan. On Shelvey, it's not just his limited ability and dwindling physicality, it's the way the Premier League is played now. The successful teams play high intensity, high energy football. Even in his pomp he wasn't built for that. We could have sold him to West Ham back in 2019. I can only assume that either wages, or fee was the sticking point. Both of those are the fault of Ashley's NUFC.

Ok, a few sweetcorns to pick out of that pile of shit; 'Outlasting' other players during the tenure of Mike Ashley is no sign of quality. Henri Saivet was at the club for how long? Emmanuel Riviere joine in 2014, left in 2017. Demba Ba joined in the June of 2011 and left in the January of 2013. Riviere outlasted Ba. Who'd you rather have stayed at the club? 'Out performing'? By what measure? Goals? 16 in 7yr, only 9 in the Prem. (~0.1 GpG) Assists? 24 in 7yr, 12 in the Prem (~ 0.13 ApG) Anecdotally? Mythologically? Is that good enough for the chief creator of a team that's aiming to finish midtable of the Premier League? I mean, Cabaye was only here for 2 1/2 seasons and scored more goals and had more assists than Voldemort has managed. Of course dropping deep a valid attack on Shelvey's ability. It's plain as the nose on your face that Jonjo Shelvey plays deeper regardless of our setup, he favours long searching balls, and his mobility is limited. The reason he drops back into the hole in front of the defence is he has neither the will nor ability to play those long passes he loves from the centre of midfield. He hasn't the alacrity of thought, nor feet, to do it in the engine room. Well, Hayden is a defensive midfielder, his job is to disrupt and be the aggressor so I'd expect him to have committed more fouls and received more yellows. What your cherry picked stats don't show is how many of them are reckless and stupid, which was my point. The difference is that Jonjo Shelvey is ostensibly on the pitch to create, to provide an outlet, provide a goal threat. He doesn't do that consistently well enough to have deserved staying at a Premier League club aiming for midtable. And had we not been owned by Ashley, I'm sure a competent manager would have tried to peddle him toot suite.

Shelvey is fundamentally not our best midfielder. Had we played with defenders like Schar and Lejeune who can pass the ball a bit, plus midfielders like S.Longstaff, we'd not miss the range of passing that Shelvey is perceived to possess. It'd be made up in the aggregate. But we'd also get the energy, discipline and mobility that he lacks. I don't get Clarko's point? These players who are past their limited best are not further evidence of the neglect of the club?

This kind of nonsense wouldn't fly on our podcast. Shelvey being in the sides of McClaren, Benitez (Champ) and Bruce does not mean he's good. We've had better centre mids than him, Merino for a fucking start. Hayden in his role, Longstaff at times. Shelvey has been detrimental to the way we could play, but Bruce was not about to drop the guy that can ping a 60yd ball to the isolated striker, was he? To say Shelvey is anything but a liability is to ignore his propensity for dropping deeper and deeper searching for a pocket of space from which to launch his Hollywood balls unmolested. It's to ignore his propensity for picking up stupid cards for rash and reckless fouls. It's to ignore his diminishing returns from set pieces. This Clarko is ignoring everything but his place as a mainstay in Bruce's teamsheet. And when you remember Joelinton was picked every fucking week, that doesn't exactly suggest that's a good measure of ability. Shelvey should have been peddled long ago. S.Longstaff could have been put in as a midfield partner for Hayden which would have allowed a modern energetic style of play. Gayle's goals could have been made up in the aggregate, or found in Armstrong or Toney.

I bet that Simon Tweddle is still clinging onto his job, surviving like a fucking roach.

Oui, je suis la plage.

Wait, wait, wait, you're twisting about dogs when you've allowed actual vermin in your house? But yeah, if you're some Beta-cuck whose own body can't handle the horror of a few airborne puppy particles, then don't get a dog.

Were you talking to her? If so, I can fully understand.

Walking a dog is excellent for your mental health. Much better than having a cat ignore you, shred your sofa, then push your Alexa off the counter to it's doom.

Yeah, why love something if it's going to die at some point?! Don't cat owners have to clean out their pets shit from a little tray that they keep INSIDE THE FUCKING HOUSE??

I'm going to take it as a compliment.

Oh Cats can fucking do one, but Dogs... Dogs are brilliant. We're going to have the kitchen done, but as soon as that's done we're getting a cockapoo, a cavapoo, a bordoodle or something similar. You know why? Dogs are mint and you're wrong.

A Blow (up) Job?

Well you prefer the left wing and you are partial to a Chinese takeaway...

Once you get past the initial setting up of tactics, training, and all that shit, the work load drops off massively. Then it's just tweaking bits here and there. Sack off 90% of the "news" items because they're irrelevant. Then it's just about scouting and the actual games.

I feel very attacked.

You get a hamster stuck up your shitter or something? Dogs are mint, better than people and no mistake.

Have they spelled it "Cristal" Palace in the background on the tv? What's going on there?

"And remember, just because he's buying you dinner, doesn't mean you owe him anything"

Underestimating the Incel market there.

My Dad reckons he lost his license because he was drinking the profits. Over the 40 years he's lived in that village I reckon the old fella's only set foot in 2 of the 5 pubs. "I like what I like". Feel bad for him now like, his two best mates died this year (non-COVID) so he's got no one to go to the pub with.