The Fish

Oh, Fist... I'm so disappointed in you.

Nobody has made a 'smashing that pussy' joke. I think we can all be very proud.

Orrrrr

I could clear it up in a jiffy.

I think that speaks to the core of stand up; the unexpected. Few stand ups can still get the unexpected laugh, decades into their careers.

Not really. I think he's fully aware of how awful the joke is, but I'm saying I believe he expected the crowd to be shocked, rather than encouraged. He tells jokes about rape, misogyny, murder, 'If only Africa had more mosquito nets then every year we could save millions of mosquitoes from dying needlessly of aids'. The laughter is supposed to come from people being appalled at the words and by extension the comedian, not agreeing with him. As was the case with the Gypsy joke. Just so we're clear, the above is only my opinion. I still think it's a racist joke, and he's got it wrong.

I don't think they'll go down, but the more teams in the mix, the better, if you ask me. Which you didn't but I'm telling you anyway. Reported. I feel seen. I think any squad moving from 7 days off from 11, to a pressing game was always going to take time to adjust. Remember him blaming the Sports Scientists for all the cheat days? But you only have to look at the uptick in our pressing game and how we don't look paggered by 90s minutes to see that days off doesn't get you fitter. I think Chris Wood wasn't bought for this side, I think he was bought because he was immediately available, for a palatable price. Couple of people on Twitter were saying we should have gone for Weghorst, but I honestly think if we'd try to sign him, we'd have had to have paid twice the price to get him, and he's more of a gamble than Wood is. Bruno is plenty capable of longer passes, but I think him + Willock and Joelinton in the centre (and the two fullbacks) will mean we don't need to rely on that longer passing game. It's a real shame that Targett will miss the next game, because he looked so assured at left back and that gave ASM a much better platform to start from.

It's the motion of the ball when it hits an apex, and the weight of the boulder when it tumbles down the hole. Something just looks off.

Don't you get foxes round your way? I had one chilling by the garden furniture last September

I've not had it. Or if I have, I've handled it like a champ.

Am I being whooshed? That's CG, right?

It's an Americanised version of Murder in Successville. But the UK version had reality tv celebri-whos and was all the funnier for it.

I think you have crossed me for the last time!

Re: Jimmy Carr's joke. I honestly think he underestimated the casual racism towards gypsies. I think he was expecting the same kind of "I can't believe he's said that" reaction that he gets from many of his other jokes. Instead he got a glimpse into the bigotry that Al Murray gets when he tours his Pub Landlord stuff. The Pub Landlord is supposed to be the butt of the joke, and in this case I personally believe Jimmy Carr thought he'd be the butt of the joke too. Doesn't make the joke funny, inoffensive, or anything else, just my take. I'm just asking questions guys.

Where's the fucking Arcade?

Why? He doesn't have a history of scoring or providing assists.

Don't rush him in, give some minutes for sure, but don't start him if he's not ready. That's very Pardew.

... The plane is a full suite man. Honestly, it's like you've never been on a private plane before.

Is a private jet not first class?

Thing is, Everton's issues are legion. I think it's an issue not just of management, but of an unbalanced squad and I don't think van de Beek and Alli solve those issues

The irony of Luke Edwards being shocked at football fans holding a grudge is hilarious. Steve Bruce's best quality is surely his ability to get a few people on his side. He must be likeable in person, because in the media spotlight he's prickly, inarticulate and bland. At least Steve McClaren had an avuncular charm. He was shit, but I never hated him. He's claimed that the abuse is nothing he ever experienced before, at every club when the limitations of his ability are laid bare. He said the mackems hated him because he was a Geordie, that Villa fans hated him because he managed Birmingham, we hated him because he managed Sunderland. When, in truth, we all disliked him because of his personality and, more importantly, his football.

Sorry to hear that Renton, hope he can rest in peace.

Took me less time to get that the coffee thing.

I think with Lewis, as with Murphy, you have to look at who coached them and how the teams were set up. I don't think Lewis is a midtable/top half left back which is surely what we should now be aiming for. But I don't think he's as bad as some have made out.