The Fish

there's crow and I know he's outside, but it's really fucking dark, so I can't see him, so I plan to wait for a passing comet or low flying helicopter to either scare him off, or at least reveal his location. once I know ehere he is I can stop thinking about that Simpsons episode where Bart is the Raven from Edgar Allen Poe's poem.

made my joke, but without the subtlety or grace that I employed. silly hippy

Why is hippy boy serenading me? help... Offspring is finished and now I'm officially concerned. I'm close to losing bowel control...

you know, it's odd, for a hippy to have such pent up homophobia... perhaps you're not quite settled into the whole "scene" yet. why not watch some Top Gun, it might bring that fear out from within. don't worry kiddo I'm sure that "papa" will understand and will welcome you with open arms, he wouldn't turn away you, whether you want to be his son OR his daughter. Famous Sammynb quotes "Ah'd like t' intr'duce you to my wife and my sister......Here she is" "Ah've bin married three timesan' ah still gots the same damn in-laws." He lit a match in the bathroom and his house exploded right off it's wheels.

has convinced me I should approach the BBC for a grant so that I may perform with some degree of comfidence upon the great stages in Britain, nay, the world I want to be a Thespian! mainly because they get all the best dungaree/boot combinations.... AND they're more likely to get a chance to play a CGI fish in a major Pixar animation about finding a Roman emporer under water, when he's actually in the dentists all along.

I am listening to the Offspring and that means you can't upset me I like their happy carefree ditties so ner

...Liquid...? FUCKING LIQUID! you need to grow up and avoid that shit hole like the fucking plague. if anyone ever tells you it's anything but an utter dive, spit in their face and turn around twice, citing two hail mary's and one hows your father. it's the grubbiest little hovel on the Bigg Market, and that's saying something, their idea of a good time is to turn down everything but the bass on the "choonz" that spill out through the cracks in the wall caused by the seemingly endless application of pubescent stomach acid. couldn't give a shit about most bars in town, but this one is an absolute fucking disgrace. You'd be better off on a park bench imho

hu hu hu you're from down under hu hu hu are you from Queensland fnah hu hu hu cos that'd make you a queen

There's a chance he'll get the firing squad. Won't happen like, but 15 years hard labour in a nam prison might finish him off. 59232[/snapback] Hope he goes to prison tbh, fucking sick cunt. I don't see why he would need to molester kids if he is a celeb, there's shit loads of lasses that would love to just shag a celeb, doesnt need to gaan and fuck kids the nonce. 59233[/snapback] Jesus wept. 59240[/snapback] Nonce 59243[/snapback] New. Favourite. Poster. Ever. Fact

you do the shake and vac and put the freshness back, do the shake and vac and then wipe your arse on the hearth rug like a bad dog!

.. darn you Lou-annabellafontaine queen of the ?"huh"? now I gotta go back downstairs and make myself a real cuppa tea after seeing that one. oh and Hippy boy, you should know that I'm standing in your house Dressed as a mime, my beret at a jaunty angle with a stiletto dagger dancing through my nimble fingers a bloodied smile 'pon my face and the severed limb of a family pet stuck 'twixt my teeth. I'm softly singing "Where have all the Cowboys gone" by Paula Cole and I'm coming to cut your hippy face off

can't tie his own laces and employs a cadre of highly trained woodlice to undertake the simple feat ...I made a pun... and must admit a permitted a titter to pass 'twixt my lips.

shoulda known hippy boy was lurking

that's sweet of you. ok now that you're my servant I need you to come make me a brew, and a toasted sarny... oooh and find something to warm me hands up cos I've just fingerless cycling gloves and they're cold... a nice mug of tea would be nice... oh but you're already doing that. lucky day you only have to do two things now yay fer you!

YAY huzzah, pip pip and yipity fucking doo daa finished my report with over 12 hours to spare! well... now I've got hours and hours of playlists, so I can't really use that as an excuse to not do work... how the bloody hell am I going to procrastinate now? oh dear.. this is troubling

the apartment is a decent bar, bit expensive, but that has the advantage of keeping pikey fuckers out generally high calibre of totty and a decent atmosphere, can merrily get plastered on proper drinks or have a quiet drink with your mates. I'd rather that instead of buying warm lager in plastic pint glasses, having to literally fight your way to the bar and then have your drink spilt the instant you turn around cos some dippy cow is on her hen night and has to kiss as many blokes as possible for a dare, cos Sharons dead crazy... fucking hate Blu Bambu, Baja and all that shite, places like Mood in the Gate are just as bad tbqf. I like real pubs as well; just not for a night out in town.

.. well it made me laugh

has sewn a desire in me, to use that floor slapping smiley.... damn you

is projecting and deflecting. should be informed of my glee, for I've found the magic Sammynb starter button. it's like a firework, just light the touch paper, stand back and watch it gOOooOooOOooOOOoOOoOOOoOO o

that's right, you tell them all Sammy boy, it's the carpenters or nothing am I right or am I right on?

is now justifying his hippy-hood? quaint

was she short, dark haired and southern Lou? if so she sounds like the woman who I was talking about earlier... either in this thread or another one which has basically turned into a conversation about comedians between you and I with occasional contributions from the duller members of the board. if not then I bid you adieu

I aim to please. oh and I got 4000th reply and Lou got 4000th post. and Haley Joel Osman (sp?) sees dead people... all the time. which if it were true isn't indicated in the film cos he can hide in tents and stuff... he should have said "I see dead people most of the time, but only when I'm not hiding from them or have my eyes shut, and in fact not actively looking at them"; which to be fair can be said for the rest of us too... he's just a little precious about it I thinki.

is not a happy hippy is a hissy hippy wants to be a pretty hippy but is just a sissy hippy

so does the UPS bloke, but I aint paying £8 to watch him tell a joke.