The Fish

They've spent c£130m on an ageing defensive midfielder who has never been the most mobile, a 5'9" centreback and a leftback with some potential. They've sold/loaned out a few players; Alex Telles Álvaro Fernandez Andreas Pereira Dean Henderson Edinson Cavani Jesse Lingard Juan Mata Lee Grant Nemanja Matić Paul Pogba but the only one they've got any cash for is £8.5m from Fulham for Pereira.

I don't think it solves their issues either. £70m on an ageing defensive midfielder, when; their defence is broken, their midfield is... messy and their strikeforce isn't working. They've got a manager who'll want high-energy, fluid movement, and a high standard of technical ability. The Premier League demands physicality, and pace. Who the fuck is there now who can provide that, and who have they bought this window who can?

I'll just put a magnet at the end of the drive, fry your circuitboards before you get to the front door.

I'd probably want to name 11 players, mind. We're good, but I don't think we should try and beat them with 8 men.

Looking forward to seeing Casemiro try to keep up with the pace and movement of even the most average midfields in the Premier League.

He's booked a table at the Wetherspoons near his house and doesn't want to lose the deposit.

I'm getting strong 2011/12 vibes from the start of this season.

I think the difference between then and now is the ethos of Howe's teams. Whomever we play in the cup game, the way we play will stay largely the same. I'd rest ASM and Bruno, maybe Trippier and one of the centre backs. Maybe give Dubravka a game? With Longstaff, Murphy, Fraser, Krafth, Anderson and the like playing we should still have enough to beat Tranmere. Especially if we play with the same intensity we saw in the games against Forest and Brighton.

Surly not.

Well, that was a challenging wank.

If I was a Man Utd fan, I'd take the 3-0 loss.

Made a bet with a mate that we'd finish above his Man Utd side this season. After spending 10 minutes telling me everything that's wrong with his club and how he genuinely thinks they're at risk of going down if not this season then soon, he still took the bet. "Ronaldo and Casemiro" were his reasons for thinking the side he just slated, would finish above us. So if anyone wants a free £25 in May, I suggest finding a Man Utd fan sharpish.

The only bold thing around here is your interpretation of the English language.

It's derivative and only really works if you've got a nun and a semi-on

That wasn't a joke, I know all the jokes and that wasn't one of them.

What, in the ever living fuck, are you on about?

Yeah, if Palace, or Brighton try that, I think they'll get taken apart.

This season has started so bizarrely. No way, after 3 games, you would have predicted the top half to be; 1 Arsenal 2 Manchester City 3 Leeds United 4 Tottenham 5 Brighton 6 Newcastle Utd 7 Fulham 8 Brentford 9 Crystal Palace 10 Nott'ham Forest Specifically the teams in bold and for the bottom 6 to look like this; 15 Liverpool 16 Everton 17 Wolves 18 Leicester City 19 Manchester Utd 20 West Ham Again, specifically the teams in bold. When you look at the fixtures of the Unexpected from the top half Leeds surely wouldn't have been expecting 7pts from Wolves (h), Southampton (a) and Chelsea (h) Fulham to get 5 from Liverpool (h), Wolves (a) and Brentford (h) Forest to get 4 from Newcastle (a), West Ham (h), and Everton (a) Liverpool can go 6th with a >2 goal victory tonight, I guess, but dropping points to Fulham and Palace will really damage their title chances. More so, I'd argue, than Man City failing to win at St James'.

That's just incredible. To think for the past 8yrs or so, our midfield was, at best, hard-working.

I think we're agreeing here. 2 options, play quick or play long, both increase likelihood of a turnover. You might not use long ball often, but it's an option. That's all I'm saying.

I don't follow. If any team is pressed as you were yesterday, they have two options to get around the press, they either; play the ball quicker around the pressure, or they play it long over the pressure. Either option increases the likelihood of turning over possession.

I think that Man City can handle most teams pressing because it's not always married with the kind of bravery on the ball that we showed. So often you face a team who're pressing from the front, ahead of an entrenched back line. So they press, force you to play the ball long or more quickly which leads to a turnover, but once they have the ball they lump it or knock it around at the back, they don't commit men forward, or try to play around you. Guimaraes, Joelinton exemplified that bravery on the ball, taking touches under pressure etc. I don't think you played poorly and, yes, when Haaland is more accustomed to his teammates, the PL and Guardiola's style, you'll be even more dangerous. However, I think the way we set out, played to our strengths AND exploited the chinks in your almost impenetrable armour.

Aye, it's a penalty. Stones clatters Schar, isn't even looking for the ball. He does look at the ref in the immediate aftermath though, because he's feeling very very guilty.