The Fish

Saw someone on twitter liken the Carabao Cup to a holiday romance. When you're in it it's dead exciting and fun, the minute you're out you don't care about it at all.

We controlled the game, had a few chances (Almiron's chief among them), and all while looking rusty A F. We're through to the quarter finals of the League Cup where the best sides left in are Man Utd (probably) and one of Man City and Liverpool. I'm not saying we'll definitely win the cup, but we're definitely winning the League Cup lads. Leicester put 3 past a side 23rd in League 1, let not get carried away with their result. They're in a good run of form, but we've looked solid at the back for ages. Only conceded 2 goals in the last 8 games.

I know you're being flippant, but honestly, we'd need to increase the number of point we take from the 'top 6' clubs if we were to seriously mount a title challenge.

Caught between the memory of optimism based on our amazing form pre-World Cup, and the bedrock of pessimism from over a decade of Ashley and even longer of Cup fuck ups. I'm going for a close run 2-1.

And on that bombshell...

Listen here Private Pissy Pants, we're 3rd and that's unbelievable, but we are categorically not in the title hunt. Not yet. We'd need to improve our form beyond the spectacular return we're seeing now. You flit between hubris and pessimism quick as a hiccough. It must be exhausting. It's exhausting to watch. But I cannot imagine living a life that oscillates so.

Haven't England got an atrocious record when their game's on itv?

There's starving kids in Africa man. They'd love a holiday.

That suggests I've something to wind down from.

Haaland had a release clause, and trophy laden, title-chasing Man City had been pursuing him for a while. Kvaratskhelia doesn't have a release clause, we are not laden with Trophies, nor are we title chasing. He moved to Napoli in July and his contract runs until 2027. He's scored 6 and assisted 5 in 11 starts in the league. Napoli are currently unbeaten, sitting on top of Serie A, 8pts clear of AC Milan. They topped their Champions League group, ahead of Liverpool and Ajax (and Rangers) and are favourites to get passed Frankfurt. I'd be absolutely staggered if he left Napoli after 6 months when everything is going so well.

No chance we'd get Kvaratskhelia for £50m, scant chance we'll get him in January at all. Still think DM and depth at fullback are the priorities.

Needs an intervention, that lad.

That was the joke. I know it's Monday, but come the fuck on Bridget.

And of those games, how many were competitive, how many were knock out, and how many were penalty shoot-out losses? Sounds to me like someone's made up their mind first, then tried to find a stat to support that argument.

Sorry, We've got a long standing special bond with Schalke that was created purely because the Bundesliga returned before the Premier League. The two Bundesliga clubs vying for the support of Newcastle United fans ahead of the season restart - Chronicle Live

Precisely. I see shit lie this quote-tweeted onto my twitter feed (and I'm guilty of doing the same), when that's precisely what the aim of their schtick is. Clicks. Interactions. Engagements. Like that weird spotty tory kid who, when it snowed in December, made some facetious comment about 'global warming'. He knows exactly what he's doing and will be rubbing one out as his notifications go bananas. There's seemingly no recourse. I mean Alex Jones tried to wave his stuff off as entertainment, but was rightly financially butt-fucked by the bereaved parents of the Sandy Hook victims. I had hoped that that might have given other professional trolls pause, but nope. Genuinely, I get most of my news from here. You all act like a bullshit-filter (except for transfer rumours, I'm looking at you @wykikitoon), so I fret for people like my parents who get their updates from the BBC or, increasingly, facebook.

We could always eat them?

You can export from Access. Choose External Data, then Excel.

Access is a database platform, it's not like excel. You got screen grabs?

I've used it a fair amount. What's up?

Get this facebook shit off this website! Jesus Christ, Craig. Jesus Fucking Christ.

To be fair, the news, the pandemic, the weird timing of the World Cup has made this year feel decades long.

I don't get why there'd need to be a 'special connection' to set up the supporters branch though? If 3 West Brom Fans were over in Peru and decided to set up a Baggies Branch there, they wouldn't need to fabricate a link between them and Allianza Lima, would they? It's just weird behaviour. The Friendship cup, the Feyenoord thing, Bilbao. Weird.

How biased was that commentary? Piping off Matthews the whole game.

Fucking Dinner with him? What, sitting through a 60 minute monologue about how great he is while trying to choke down a cold McDonalds. I know I shouldn't be, but I'm still staggered that there are people trying to get on board this NFT thing, when it's clearly a fucking trainwreck.