The Fish

Aye, Eddie's shown a hunger for glory and he's not going to let a silly little thing like morals stop him getting that sweet sweet competition bonus.

I've never understood this idea that the FA, the Premier League are whomever would be 'out to get' one club. Especially one like Arsenal, that has been an entrenched member of the 'Top 2', the 'Top 4', the 'Big Six' for decades. Seen it from fans of all clubs, 'THEY' are out to get them. Fuck off man.

Stood to one side, didn't it? More like the Statue of Liberty than the popular image?

Nobody in the top flight gives up more chances than Fulham. They don't press particularly enthusiastically, either. Pereira and Palhinha are their key men, if our midfield can boss them and still have an attacking threat we should do well. Ream and Adarabaiyo aren't the quickest so I'd go for through balls to catch them on the turn.

Apparently the 3 match ban costs Chelsea £1.2m

João Felix sent off for a shocking tackle.

But you try telling kids nowadays, and they won't believe you

Bricklayers Arms is good. Built for dwarfs though.

Mate of mine is a Fulham fan and wants to know where the best Guinness can be found in town? I have no idea.

His gX? You want to know his gX? It's Fuck You Craig, Fuck you and YOUR FUCKING INTRANSIGENCE.

You going to sign anyone else? Want a terrific young prospect? Can play either right or left wing, can fill in at left back too. Passionate, good delivery, loves booting a corner flag into the testicles of a fan. May I present Ratthew Mitchie. Yours for only £30m

Mate who grew up across the road lives in Wimbourne. That's all I have to say about that.

That Lyanco was a monster in midfield, thought Armstrong lead the line well also. Chased down a lot of lost causes and never gave their CBs a moments rest.

Steady on there, CT is essentially a vegetable with ADHD, Andrew would roid-out in the first ten minutes* and while Haaland is called a machine, Gemmil is literally 50% automoton. Bad night for you lot, Southampton got in your face and disrupted your patterns, but as you suggest the changes Pep made compounded that. I'm sure you can console yourself with a PL title push, a CL trophy hunt and an FA Cup chase too. I'm confident we can get past any team over two legs, but I'm not sure that we've the experience throughout the team to turn it on in the Final against Man Utd, who I presume will end up there. I think we'll turn up, but I just think that Man Utd are a very different prospect under Ten Hag than they have been for a while.

Anyone fancy knocking up a Dan Burn as the Colossus of Rhodes bestriding the Tyne? It's for personal use.

Going to need a job lot of bronze if BDB scores the winner in the League Cup final.

British Gas charge about the same to fit it. The bastards

Listen to you, implying that Seaton Delaval is akin to Mayfair. I'm mostly joking, but the overwhelming majority of people from Liverpool that I've met have been exactly like the stereotype. Over inflated sense of self worth, unshakeable confidence in the impact their city has had on music, comedy, the arts. Instant over the top defence against any criticism (perceived or otherwise) of their club, their city, their music, comedy or similar. Some of them can be ok if you dance between those laser beams, but a lot can't.

Only 3 in 10 chances that fell to Longstaff are put away, yes. Maybe 4 in 10 chances like Dan Burn's are put away. Because there are more players who can finish like Longstaff than there are players who can finish like Shearer. Those chances can fall to defenders, midfielders or just shit strikers. We're dealing with big numbers here.

7pts between 1st and 3rd, 7pts between 5th and 17th.

loads of chances, not a lot of big ones in the first half. e.g. Longstaff's chance in the first minute was only something like 0.3xG.

Ee bah gum, yo tek tha back or al git t'HR on't you. pu wood in'thole

It's so transparent that the barometer for the PL's quality is how well/poorly Newcastle United are doing. If we were rock bottom, the PL would be praised "They don't belong in the top flight", safely midtable "There's a lot of stodge in the top flight", and so on. It's just a gossamer thin comfort blanket. They would be the league's whipping boys were they to get promoted this season and deep down they know it. Even shambles like Southampton, Wolves and Everton would batter them. Each of the three teams currently in the relegation places would be odds-on favourites to get promoted from the Championship, such is the gulf in quality and wealth.

Hillborough is definitely off the table. Scousers being self-aggrandising arseholes is fair game though.