Gemmill

I'm hoping for a scandal where the Qataris get caught paying opposition players to chuck matches against them. All of this to blow up during the tournament, making Infantino long for a return to simpler days as a ginger Italian.

WC looking mint so far.

The WOKE Dr Gloom!

This FIFA Uncovered documentary has the absolutely jarring image of people walking through the airport in Nepal with fucking coffins on suitcase trolleys. The bodies of migrant workers shipped back home after they died in Qatar and picked up at the airport by their families. I fucking hope they weren't going round on the baggage carousel.

I would start a YouTube channel entirely dedicated to showing all the available camera angles and setting it to different music and stuff. Super slomo of him stotting his big frog gob off the deck.

It will be an excellent day for this country when Farage pegs it. I'm hoping for a massive heart attack live on his own show.

I didn't realise Sarkozy basically promised France's WC vote to Qatar, and then very shortly after: - Qatar bought PSG and pumped a shit load of cash into it. - Bein Sports paid massively over the odds for the rights to Ligue Un - and a load of other commercial deals happened between France and Qatar in short order.

Neither do you.

Day before the World Cup and there's no football focus on. Already feels weird as fuck this WC.

I was never ginga, but I would gladly swap my current situation for a full head of bright orange hair.

The bit at the end of the article declaring proudly how he's "never shown my hand over Brexit", like he's some unreadable poker player. Mate, have you read the article you've just written.

Having red hair in Italy though lads. That's like being allergic to pasta.

Exactly what came into my head too. "It is a faaaight you will lose."

Watching FIFA Uncovered on Netflix. Blatter features heavily as a talking head and seems to be labouring under the misapprehension that this is a documentary about the many great successes of Sepp Blatter. Zero humility, zero repentance. I reckon I could cheerfully strangle him.

A bloke who wants to be Prime Minister can't really be going around telling people he hates Tories and if they know what's right they'd cut Tories out of their lives entirely. That's for the Laura Pidcocks of this world and we all know how well that worked out.

Shouldn't be that hot on the bench.

She's been sticking to a calorie surplus Dave.

Space Karen is class. I'm just waiting now for a news alert on my phone to tell me twitter's gone offline. It can only be a matter of time now.

Are you wankers slagging my mam off again?

Those own goals in full:

The IFS has rinsed them this morning. Referring to a series of own goals by the Conservative government going right back to Osborne in 2010, and including the absolutely terrible Brexit that's been delivered.

How are we possibly supposed to pick who we would most like to see lose here?!