Gemmill

This is marvellous.

It is. Majority Tory though, which slightly damages his claims that this is a Labour witch hunt.

Isn't the vote just on whether he knowingly misled parliament? And the punishment that stems from that is binary?

Sounds like a short arse to me.

2 minutes too late. Pictures of you in your new spray on t-shirt when it arrives please, PL.

This thing was supposed to be a "bombshell" that turned the tide in his favour. It's genuinely pathetic, I'm amazed it has seen the light of day.

This perfectly encapsulates his argument.

Lads what you buying shirts for these minnows for anyway?

Johnson's dossier is out. I'd forgotten what it was like to have to listen to this lying cunt trying to weasel his way out of something. Anyway it's all everybody else's fault that he wasn't informed and he was only saying what he'd been told in good faith. Cunt. Basically.

I've watched too much 24 Hours in A&E, and heard them use the word "de-gloved" too much to get a motor bike.

Lock that prostitute up.

🤤🤤🤤

If he's looking on the Betfair exchange, it's not a model, it's an exchange so basically wisdom of crowds.

Pornhub.ie for fingers in ewerk.

"E-I-E-I-E-I-O"

I think it was @thebrokendoll saying Bruno seems to know the words to all the songs. It's very apparent from this that he knows "E-I-E-I-E-I-O" and absolutely nothing else. But he moves his mouth very enthusiastically for the rest of the song.

Robin Van Persie's got a son called Shaqueel Van Persie. How has this news only just reached me?!

Aye we can get the club to put a CUCKED video on NUFCTV with Eddie riding my lass and Tindall ripping the piss out of me as it's happening.

My lass fancies Eddie. She fucking hates football, and HATES it when Newcastle are on telly, but whenever he's on being interviewed, she'll comment on how intelligently he speaks compared to other managers/football people, how his responses are always thoughtful etc. Anyway, out in the pub with some friends, I'm talking to one of the blokes but I can hear her talking next to me and hear Howe's name mentioned. I'm thinking wtf is she talking about Eddie Howe for, and next thing you know the phone comes out and she's pulling up pictures of him and showing them to the other lasses going "do you not think...?" I interrupted and asked why she was showing pictures of Howe, and she goes "oh he's lovely, I was just telling them about him." Bizarre.

They're too Fisher Price. Real men use Android.

I actually think Firefox might be a better browser. Being able to move the address bar to the bottom of the screen is a tremendous addition.

Aye similar, loads of space left. It's Chrome and specifically this site that's causing problems. Firefox is fine - embedded twitter posts still take longer than normal to render but no phone freeze or other shit.

More games for them is good for us. Especially when we cruise past them on April 2nd.